Ranma Chat
by obsidians
Summary: Ranma and Akane seek advice from a stranger on a chat forum when they have a fight and end up talking to each other without them realizing it. Contains no lemons or any other member of the citrus family
1. Chapter 1

I do not own Ranma ½ or its characters; Rumiko Takahashi does and I make no money from writing this story.

Akane and Ranma had had a huge fight, had insulted each other and stomped off in a huff, Akane to her room and Ranma to his. Without them knowing it, they both pulled out a flyer for a new online chat network that had been promoted in Furinkan High School. It had been designed to encourage teenagers to talk about their problems with other teenagers. It had severe restrictions on who could get an account to prevent child molesters and other such nightmarish characters from gaining access. After much rigmarole of creating a permanently hidden, in-depth profile, including entering student card numbers and the annoyance of having to choose inoffensive login names, they both finally entered into the chat forum. Ranma snarled in frustration when his suggestion of kickinass was rejected and kickinbutt was recommended instead. While Akane's suggestion of Red, became Red2221.

Red2221: Hello I'm new on here.

Bluethunder: Hello, are you a fair maiden?

Red 2221: I guess, why?

Bluethunder: Might you be single and in need of my protection from cruel males of the world?

Cutiekitty: Back off, Thunder. Don't mind him; he always hits on the new girls. Welcome Red2221, what would you like to chat about?

Akane felt rather flustered by how outspoken everyone was.

Red2221: Well, I had a fight with a boy and wanted to discuss it with someone.

Bluethunder: Oh you have a boyfriend, never mind. Hi Kickinbutt, you're new around here. Are you a fair maiden whose beauty outshines the very sun?

Kickinbutt: What the hell's that supposed to mean? I ought to beat the crap out of you for your insinuation.

Ranma was annoyed at the question and suspicious that someone might've figured out whom he was and was bugging him about his curse.

Bluethunder: I wouldn't bother you again.

Bluethunder stalked off the check out the new arrivals to the chat room and decided he loathed Kickinbutt

Cutiekitty: Welcome Kickinbutt, I'm the mod of this site. You've already agreed to our terms and conditions, so I don't need to remind you that we run a clean site. I ask that you refrain from foul language and don't threaten other patrons.

Kickinbutt: Oh, I'm sorry

Cutiekitty: That's okay; just make sure that it doesn't happen again. Can I direct you to a certain chat thread?

Kickinbutt: Well, there's this girl I'm having problems with.

Cutiekitty: There are plenty of chat threads for that, I would recommend 'Can't live with them, They're from Venus 'Cause They Lack A (sorry the rest has been deleted) and Chicks are Weird' If you meet anyone you wish to discuss your matter privately with, then you have the option of inviting them into a private chat room that's invisible to all others. We discourage the use of real life names or anything traceable. Enjoy yourself.

Red2221: Sorry I couldn't help overhea-well, over reading, you're having relationship troubles Kickinbutt?

Kickinbutt: Yes, I'm new on here and wanted to get some relationship advice, but I don't think I came to the right place. It sounds like the chat threads that I was directed to are just guys complaining about girls.

Red2221: What a coincidence, I came for advice about a guy in my life too.

Kickinbutt: He your boyfriend?"

Red2221: No, no, no he's my......friend. How about her, is she your girlfriend?

Kickinbutt: NO, No.........she's my friend also. Red2221, do you mind if I ask you for some advice on women?

Red2221: You want MY advice on relationship?

Kickinbutt: Sure why not, you're a girl ain't ya?

Red2221: Yes, I am. I've never had a boyfriend though.

Kickinbutt: Hey no problem, I just need to know how women expect to be treated. I'm seriously bad at that.

Red2221: Sure, would you like to go into a private room?

Kickinbutt: Lead the way

Once they were there

Kickinbutt: So what's your real name?

Red2221: Just call me Red; I'd rather not give that if you don't mind. How about you? I can't keep on calling you Kickin.

Kickinbutt: You can call me Ray.

Ranma was afraid of giving his real name too.

Red2221: So what'd you like to know?

Kickinbutt: How to talk to women.

Red2221: Just be nice to them. Unlike some people I could mention.

Kickinbutt: Your......friend?

Red2221: Yes, he always insults my body and calls me unflattering names.

Kickinbutt: He sounds like a jerk. Why put up with that? Dump his butt.

Red2221: It's harder than that; he sort of lives with me.

Kickinbutt: Oh, that sucks. Mine lives with me too.

Red2221: It's not entirely his fault; I kind of insult him back. How about you, Ray?

Kickinbutt: I find myself saying things to my friend that I don't mean. It's like I open my mouth to say one thing and something else comes out entirely. Also, she gets jealous of other girls that I could care less about, it's the girls coming on to me, not the other way around.

Red2221: Sounds like she isn't seeing the big picture. Do you like this girl?

Kickinbutt: I.....guess. Of all the girls I know, I like her the best. I just don't know how to tell her that. I try, but again say the wrong things and she gets mad at me.

Red2221: It sounds like a simple misunderstanding. Why don't you try giving her a compliment and I mean a real one that will let her know that you find her attractive. Not one like: you did the dishes really well tonight.

Kickinbutt: Is that all that it takes to talk to women?

Red2221: No but it's a start, no one likes to be insulted on a daily basis. Believe me I know what I'm talking about; my friend does it to me all the time.

Kickinbutt: you know your friend might have the same problem communicating with women as I do. Why don't you calmly explain that it disturbs you when he does that?

Red2221: I kind of have a temper.

Kickinbutt: Me too.

Red2221: I'll tell you what; let's vow as online chat buddies, that we won't lose our temperatures with our.......friends so easily.

Kickinbutt: How about we try and contact either other when we start to get annoyed with them?

Red2221: That sounds like a good idea. Would you like to be friends?

Ranma pondered this statement, wondering why it sounded so familiar. Then paused when he heard Kasumi calling to the household that dinner was ready.

Kickinbutt: Sure, you can be my first online friend. Oh, gotta go, I'm being called for dinner.

Akane paused in her typing when she heard Kasumi's voice.

Red2221: Me too. I'll try to talk to him and pm you the results.

Kickinbutt: Try me here later, I might be back on.

Red2221: Good, now promise me that you'll be complimentary and won't lash out at her if you lose your temper.

Kickinbutt: I promise. Now promise me the same.

Red2221: I promise.

Both logged off and passed each other in the hall on the way to the dining room. Ranma was surprised when Akane stopped him.

"Evening Ranma, I want to apologize about earlier. I realize my cooking isn't the best because I fail to follow recipes properly as I should. However, that being said, it hurts me when you mock me rather then helping me learn how to cook. This causes me to lash out and say things that I don't mean; I don't think that you're stupid in the least. I know that you have to learn to cook early when you lived on the road, but that wasn't the case with me. Do you honestly think that I'm hopeless?" Akane implored him.

Ranma's eyes opened wide in shock at her speech and an insult sprang to his lips, which he quelled out of his promise to his new friend. "I'm sorry too Akane. I don't think you're hopeless and I can help you if that's what you want. I'm sorry that I've called you unsexy and uncute in the past when you're obviously neither" he said honestly.

Akane's eyes lit up "you mean it?"

Ranma rubbed the back of his head in embarrassment and said "seriously, you look great. I also wanted to tell you that that blue skirt of yours looks nice on you"

Akane blushed and skipped happily down to dinner.

The other family members were puzzled when the two were pleasant to each other throughout the entire meal and even volunteered to do the dishes. They performed this task with a worried Kasumi hovering over them, expecting at any moment to lose her mother's dishes to a fight between the two fiancés. She paced after them when they returned to the dining room. Where they announced that they were making dinner the next night together in an effort to improve Akane's cooking skills; then Kasumi joined the other Tendo's and Saotome's in the famous shock pile.

Later that night Akane looked for the now familiar fanged smiley faced avatar (hee hee, people on aff familiar with my avatar will understand this) and was happy to see it.

Red2221: Hi Ray, I just wanted to tell you that it worked! We had a pleasant evening and didn't have a single fight!

Kickinbutt: I'm glad, your advice worked to. However I have to go to bed now as I have school first thing in the morning.

Red2221: Well huge hugs, good night. I owe you one!

Kickinbutt: Right back at you, sweet dreams Red

Both people logged off and lay back in bed. They reflected how pleasant the night had been and then dropped off to sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N actually I didn't say that this was a website for Furinkan High School only, I intended it for high schools all over Japan. I just said that Furinkan was promoting it, I should have been clearer I guess.

Also I simply can't write the way that Ranma speaks. I grew up in a small town full of people that spoke that way and can't abide writing it. I cringe when I hear people say "I seen" Therefore I tend to write him how my much younger brother speaks (I'm 38, he's 16)

******

"Ranma you baka" Akane snarled after his fighting with Ryoga caused her new dress to be ruined. She'd already been hurt that he hadn't said a word about it and the now it had a huge irreparable rip in the hem.

"Akane, it's just a dress at least you're okay. Haven't I warned you about staying out the way? You could have been hurt!" Ranma snarled back, more out of concern for his fiancée then out of anger.

He could only watch stupefied while her eyes filled with tears and she ran away crying "drop dead!"

He glanced at Ryoga, who still stood amongst the rubble that was always the aftermath of their fights "Do you know what that was about?" he asked in confusion.

The other boy looked back at him and replied "I've no idea. But you made Akane cry, prepare to defend yourself Ranma!" he cried and charged at him again. Ranma quickly forgot about Akane and set about defeating Ryoga as usual. It was only when he was staggering home with his clothing in a similar state to Akane's that he thought about her reaction to her dress being torn.

Akane was already online when Ranma got home. She was frantically looking for Ray, who'd become a good friend of hers and an excellent source of advice when it came to Ranma. She thought it refreshing that there were intelligent, non-perverted males in the world.

Bluethunder: Hello again Red, your name reminds me of a bright red rose from which dew sparkles shyly like diamonds betwixt its petals.

Akane wondered why this person's way of speaking seemed so familiar.

Red2221: Which high school do you attend Thunder?

Cutiekitty: Sorry Red2221 that's considered to be confidential information. We don't wish people to exchange traceable details of their lives either on the general forum or in the private chat rooms. Information exchange is only to be done through private messaging at your discretion. This is site is only for advice or information; we're not running a dating site.

Red2221: Oh I'm sorry. I was just looking for a friend on here.

Bluethunder: I can be your friend. Would you like to pm me your email address?

Akane cringed at this thought

Red2221: Thanks I'd rather not. I'm looking for kickinbutt

Bluethunder: Him again? What is it with that guy? Every thread I go onto seems to be all about him

Red2221: He's popular?

Bluethunder: The girls all seem to like him. Where do you live, would you like to meet for tea?

Cutiekitty: Thunder, what did I just say? I've already had to talk to you about this before. Now I have no choice but to lock you out for the day

Bluethunder: Cutiekitty, be reason.....

And Bluethunder was gone

Red2221: Kickinbutt there you are!

Akane was glad to see that her friend had logged on.

Kickinbutt: Hi Red, sorry I was detained. Things got crazy on the way home.

Ranma didn't want his friend to know about how crazy his life was; it was too unbelievable for most people, like something out of an anime! Akane was of the same opinion so had been toning things down on her end too.

Red2221: I've had a bad day; can we go into a chat room?

Kickinbutt: Sure

Once there

Kickinbutt: What's wrong Red? Is it that guy again? I honestly don't know what you see in him, what little you've told me leads me to believe that he's rude and arrogant.

Red2221: He's okay; he's just a bit clueless.

Kickinbutt: If you say so

Ranma had developed a little bit of a crush on the unknown girl and thought that she was wasted on her current boyfriend

Akane wondered if she should tell him that her dress got ruined during a martial arts challenge and decided against it.

Red2221: I got a new outfit and he didn't even notice. Then he spilled something on it and now it's ruined and he didn't even apologize.

Ranma thought about what to say.

Kickinbutt: First answer this: did he know that it was new?

Red2221: No

Kickinbutt: Guys don't notice these things. If you want a compliment, just point out what's new and ask his opinion about it. Do you notice each time he gets new clothes?

Akane blinked in surprise and realized that she didn't. His clothing just seemed to magically appear out of nowhere; there wasn't even a closet in Ranma's room.

Red2221: I guess I never thought about it that way.

Kickinbutt: Good the next time you're wearing something new, give him the heads up. However you should talk to him about ruining your outfit, he should've offered to buy you a new one.

Red2221: You know you're right. I've already told you that he's fairly clueless, yet I expect him to notice everything new about me. For someone who says they don't know how to talk to girls, you're doing pretty well.

Ranma rubbed the back of his head and blushed when he read this.

Kickinbutt: I have a good teacher.

Akane blushed when she read this.

Red2221: So do I. Thanks Ray, I'm going to talk to him right now. Bye

Kickinbutt: Good luck Red

Ranma logged off and then glanced at the door when there was a knock on it. Not wanting anyone to know that he was chatting on a forum, he hastily chose something on the browser history. He gazed in horror when it turned out to be a live porn site. He could only stare frozen for a few seconds at the images centimeters before his eyes and then hastily typed in the name of a search engine. Silently promising himself to have a talk with his father about what he was watching on Ranma's computer, he opened the door. He blushed at what Akane would have thought he was doing had she barged in, relieved he invited her in.

Akane sat on his bed, and then blushed at the setting. However there being no where else to sit, she stayed there on his bed with him and prayed that their fathers wouldn't walk in.

She began "Ranma I want to talk to you about earlier. I was upset because I was wearing a new dress, you never noticed it and now it's ruined" she explained.

Ranma looked at her and cautiously said "I'm sorry that your new green dress got ruined"

"It was yellow" she replied through clenched teeth.

Ranma groaned, put his head in his hands and then looked up "Akane, I'm sorry that I never noticed your dress. I honestly think you look nice in anything you wear because you're simply attractive. I only yelled at you because I was worried, a torn dress means a lot less to me than your getting hurt" he said sincerely.

Akane looked at him in surprise "do you mean that?"

Ranma thought about all that he'd learned from Red and said "yes I do. Do you want me to replace your dress?"

"That's okay, don't worry about it. I forgive you" she said and gave him an impulsive hug. She blushed when she remembered that they were doing this on his bed and leapt to her feet. "I-I gotta go" she stammered as she practically ran out the door.

Ranma remained frozen; he could still smell the soft scent of her perfume. He shook his head to clear it and marched off the find Kasumi to inquire where Akane had bought her dress.

Nabiki was checking her stock portfolio online, when there was a knock on her door. She opened it to find Ranma there "Nabiki, I need to borrow some money" he said without preamble.

"You came to the right place; the interest rate would be twenty percent. You interested?" she asked slyly.

"Okay" he agreed sourly.

Ranma went to the store and found Akane's dress with no problem, then discovered it came with a matching hat. He was happy to find out that it was on sale so he could afford to buy the dress, the hat and get it gift wrapped.

Ranma set the package in front of Akane's door, knocked on it and darted away.

Akane looked in surprise at the present and opened the card. She smiled when it read 'I want to see you in the dress this time' She undid the wrapping and giggled when she saw the pretty yellow eyelet lace sundress, then felt touched when she saw the matching hat that she couldn't afford to buy. She slipped into it and fired off a quick pm to Ray.

Red2221: Thanks it worked!

Kickinbutt: Glad I could help

Ranma typed with a smile and then answered his door to a vision in yellow. Akane spun around and asked nervously "do you like it?"

"I love it" Ranma answered.


	3. Chapter 3

Akane watched as Ranma sat down to have lunch under a tree with Shampoo, she could feel the tears start and dashed away before they spotted her.

She'd packed a special lunch for them to share and now this! She glanced around the corner while the Chinese girl unpacked two bowls of Ramen, took out some disposable chopsticks and started feeding it to him. Akane felt blinding rage and wished them both to be struck dead on the spot. Instead she saw Ranma smiling at Shampoo affectionately.

Ranma was quizzing Shampoo on Japanese words for a course that she was taking and she was cramming during his lunch hour, so she had volunteered to bring lunch for him. She was so intent on learning to speak properly, that she'd insisted on feeding him while he quizzed her. "Very good" he said when she'd gotten every word correct. "I was just wondering why you asked me to help you and not Mousse?" he asked her.

She frowned "I ask Mousse, he think Shampoo in love and want have his baby" she explained.

"Ah I understand" Ranma replied thinking about the gullible boy.

Akane stormed off with full head of steam and ran straight into Mousse.

She gasped when he hugged her, then sighed at his words "hello my beloved Shampoo" he cried happily.

"Mousse, it's me; Akane Tendo" she said, sliding his glasses off his head and positioning them on his nose.

He stepped back, peered at her through his glasses and then bowed "I'm sorry Miss Tendo. Have you seen Shampoo?" he inquired

"Sure, she's right over...." Akane started and then stopped. She didn't want Ranma being attacked and possibly being suspended for fighting on school grounds when Mousse witnessed the cozy scene between Shampoo and himself. She also realized that Mousse would be hurt just as Akane had been. "Sorry, I haven't seen her, but I was looking for you. I want to buy you a sundae for your birthday" she said, taking his arm and dragging him firmly in the opposite direction.

"But that isn't for three months!" protested the confused boy.

"Oh that's right; it's to celebrate the day you came to Japan" Akane explained and tightened her grip on his arm, practically dragging him.

"That isn't for four months" he replied.

"I guess I'm just buying you a sundae for the heck of it then" Akane said in a bright nervous voice, completely unused to forcing protesting boys to go on dates with her.

Mousse sat opposite Akane, toying with the hot fudge sundae that she'd insisted on buying him. He frowned at the girl eating the cherry from her own sundae and reached for her hands. Akane looked at him questioningly when he slipped his hands into her own. "Miss Tendo, you've always been kind to me and I've deeply regretted the times that I've had to entangle you in my fights against Ranma. However, as flattered as I am, my heart's already spoken for. If it wasn't, I might have been interested. You're a beautiful young lady and should have no trouble finding another suitor" he said with regret in his voice.

Akane was wondering if she was in a dream, she was being let down easy by Mousse of all people! "Oh that's okay, you can't blame a girl for trying" she said weakly.

"You're not too upset?" he asked kindly.

"I'll survive" she replied in a brave sounding voice.

Ranma was already online when Akane logged on, so he hurried through the advice he was giving to the other girls.

Kickinbutt: Spatulagirl, from what you're telling me; it sounds like he likes you as only a friend. Blackrose, I don't think your guy is into you either and quite frankly some of the techniques you've used against him in the past sound kind of scary. Have you ever considered professional help?

Spatulagirl: You think so? But I love him.

Kickinbutt: I advise you to find someone else who's into you.

Blackrose: How dare you! You don't know my fiancé!

Kickinbutt: It sounds like he doesn't want to either.

Blackrose: I'm leaving

Bluethunder: I applaud any methods used in the pursuit of love.

Blackrose: Really?

Bluethunder: Love is the only game worth winning.

Blackrose: I feel the same way. Would you like to go into a private chat room with me?

Bluethunder: Sure

Once there, they had been chatting for a while and hitting it off

Blackrose: It's like we're both the same person, we have so much in common

Bluethunder: Kismet, they call this sort of connection

Blackrose: Do you like exotic pets?

Bluethunder: I wouldn't let a lizard or snake stand in the way of true love.

Blackrose: Could you pm me your email address? I have a picture of myself that I would like to send you.

Bluethunder: Sure

Kodachi got the email address and didn't recognize it as she didn't exchange email with her brother. She attached a special photograph that she'd posed for to send to Ranma.

Kuno whistled in appreciation at the picture that the unknown female had sent him. He first focused on her perfect body clad in the tiniest black bikini ever, everything was covered but barely. He raised his eyes to her face and screamed in horror when he realized it was his sister's scantily clad body he'd been admiring. She had a come hither look on her face and a black rose was clenched between her teeth.

Kodachi had no great love for her brother but still was concerned when she heard his scream. She dashed into his room and could hear him puking in his washroom. Noticing her picture on his computer screen, she bolted for the washroom in the hall. The shaky and pale teens met each other in the hallway. "Sister, let us never speak of this again. But first, what the hell are you doing sending pictures of yourself like that to perverts you meet online?" he demanded.

Chat room

Red2221: You seem to be awfully popular these days.

Kickinbutt: Other girls became aware of my coaching you and have been asking me questions as well.

Akane wasn't sure she liked the sound of that

Red2221: So you're some kind of counselor now?

Kickinbutt: I like to be helpful. Why does that bother you?

Akane's face blushed at this

Red2221: Of course not. No, just in a bad mood.

Ranma sighed out loud

Kickinbutt: What did he do this time?

Red2221: How do you know it has anything to do with him?

Kickinbutt: He's the only one that seems to make you depressed. Now what did he do?

Red2221: He ate lunch with another girl right in front of the whole school

Kickinbutt: Is he romantically involved with this girl?

Red2221: She would like to be. I even had to intercept her boyfriend and pretend to take him on a date, so that neither one of them would get in trouble.

Ranma felt annoyed about this idea

Kickinbutt: What happened on this fake date?

Red2221: He kindly told me that I wasn't the one he loved, ate his sundae and went in search of her.

Ranma pictured the scene of Red kindly trying to prevent the other boy from being hurt, only to be rejected by him, and Ranma burst out laughing.

Akane turned her head in irritation towards Ranma's room and wondered what he found so funny.

Once Ranma got himself under control

Kickinbutt: I have some girls after me that I have no interest in too, just like your friend. How does he act around this girl?

Akane thought about it

Red2221: She tends to grab him and try to cuddle him and he yells at her. She's quite pushy; in fact I think she irritates him for the most part.

As Akane typed this, comprehension dawned on her, it was always Shampoo rubbing against Ranma and not the other way around!

Kickinbutt: Well how about asking him why he was having lunch with her? The explanation could prove to be quite innocent. It doesn't really sound like he's into her anyway.

Akane pondered this and realized that for all the other fiancée chased after Ranma, he never chased them back. In fact, for the most part he protected Akane against the stronger, more psychotic ones. She was starting to wonder if she'd been wrong about him.

She waited until they got some time alone just before the rest of the house went to bed.

"Can I talk to you?" she whispered to him in the hallway.

"Of course" Ranma said.

"I was just wondering why you were eating lunch with Shampoo?" Akane asked.

"She's taking a course to help improve her Japanese and asked me to help her. I agreed as long as she kept her hands to herself. Right after my lunch was her exam, so she asked if she could we could meet for a final cram session" he explained.

"Really? But why couldn't she just ask Mousse to help her?" Akane asked.

"He would have been convinced that she was in love with him if she asked for his help, so she asked me for mine because it was easier that way" Ranma explained.

"Why was she feeding you then?" Akane asked.

"I had to hold onto the book and grill her. Akane what's this about?" Ranma asked.

"You don't much care for Shampoo" she observed.

"She irritates me as much as Mousse does her. I don't like being grabbed or having unwanted attention forced on me. I also don't like it when pushy girls chase me around" Ranma admitted for the first time "I only like one girl and I'm waiting for her to realize that. I would rather eat lunch with her anytime" he said with a blush, causing Akane to blush as well.

"Ranma?" she said in a nervous voice and jumped when he kissed her on the cheek.

"Good night Akane, think of what I've said here tonight" he said and slipped into his room.

Akane touched her cheek where, she could still feel his silken lips and tried to imagine what it would be like to receive a real kiss for him, not one where he thought he was a cat and in his female form.

She went to her room and logged on.

Red2221: You're right, the explanation was totally innocent. I think he likes me!

Kickinbutt: I think mine likes me too. Promise me you won't go on fake dates with strange men anymore.

Akane giggled at that

Red2221: I promise. Goodnight Ray

Kickinbutt: Good night Red

Both logged off and lay back reflecting on an innocent peck on the cheek.


	4. Chapter 4

Kasumi chuckled, turned over her mod duties to one of her assistants and went to change. She stripped off the purple crop top, black low rise jeans and high heels that she wore when she affected her alter ego, Cutiekitty. Then took off her trademark purple rhinestone black velvet cat collar, from which a silver cat shaped tag depended.

She removed her makeup and got back into her normal dowdy dress and fastened her hair into its side ponytail. No one knew that she was the site mod, it was her dirty little secret and she loved it! Cutiekitty was bossy, sexy, sharp-witted and popular; everything that Kasumi wasn't. Sometimes she looked into her closest and couldn't believe that it belonged to a young woman. She was only nineteen! But then again, who did she have to dress up for? No one, her clothes had been her mother's clothes and perfectly suited a drab homemaker like herself.

Kasumi had felt the need to create a life for herself outside of the home, but hadn't known how to go about it. She didn't want to take dance lessons and dance with strange men, so instead she'd joined a book club that was being promoted through the local library and had met other shy people like herself. One of whom was an otaku, he'd won a contract from the government to design chat forum aimed at teens and he'd suggested to Kasumi that she would make a great moderator. He had said that with her having flexible hours and still being young enough to understand teenager's problems, she was a natural choice. She had tried to turn him down, stating that she knew nothing about computers. He had taught her everything she'd needed to know about them and now she was on the government payroll.

She'd been shy about enforcing the rules at first and a tad shocked that teenagers wanted to talk about sex so much. She had no trouble finding her voice and kicking some cyber butt after a few rude threads were published and then Cutiekitty was born. She'd wanted something that sounded harmless with an edge; kittens have razor sharp claws do they not? Now she had money coming in, a job she loved and tons of cyber friends who talked and flirted with the dynamic Cutiekitty all the time.

Only a few people knew who she really was and they were sworn to secrecy. One was Bluethunder, she had gotten to admire his persistence online, he kept get slapped down but never gave up. Kasumi could peek into people's profile at will, but preferred to get to know them by their online personalities. So when Bluethunder had sent her a pm asking her to email him she'd been flattered and a bit intrigued, especially when it turned out he lived in her hometown. They'd agreed to go to a movie together. That was the first time she'd ever gone out in public dressed as Cutiekitty. They'd both laughed when they recognized who the other was, but had went to see the movie anyway. Then got takeout sushi and ate it in a nearby park, he'd surprised her by acting like a gentlemen. It had been a fun date and they'd even kissed at the end, her first kiss and first date, she thought that Cutiekitty was the sort to kiss on a first date. However, they'd both admitted that they weren't really attracted to each other. He was too much into her sister to be anything but weirded out by the situation and she simply didn't like younger guys. So they became friends of a sort and he promised to keep her secret. She'd highly enjoyed monitoring his conversation where he was hitting on his own sister, even if he hadn't.

Kasumi frowned when she thought about Ranma and Akane, surely they must realize that they were talking to each other on some level? 'Perhaps that's the only way they can properly express themselves?' she thought. Their behaviour had certainly improved recently and they seemed to be able communicate better than before. They seemed kind of.....sweet to each other. She wondered if there was some way of informing them about this without giving herself away. But she liked being Cutiekitty and liked having a secret life for herself, no matter how small. Now she could afford to replace her more worn out clothes, pay most of the bills with her salary and afford to fix better meals these days.

Ranma was furtively watching Akane play baseball; he had to do it this way because he was afraid of being called a hentai for ogling her in her gym shorts. He had to wonder why female students were forced to wear something that drew attention those parts of them, it was like they were designed for teenaged boy's leers. He was watching her in admiration of her athletic prowess. The way her deceptively slim arms managed to knock the ball right over the fence. The way her toned legs pumped as she ran the bases and the way her cute bottom faced him as she slid into home plate. Ranma quickly blushed at the last part and averted his eyes. Akane was no Amazon, but with the Amazons he knew, he was happy about that.

Then Ranma noticed a flustered looking Ryoga going into the ball diamond and Akane and the rest of her teammates surrounding him. Ryoga caught sight of Ranma and gave him a fang toothed grin. He went around the corner and returned as P-chan, who Akane picked up with a glad cry. Ryoga smirked at Ranma while rubbing himself against Akane's chest.

"Honestly Ranma I don't see what your problem's with P-chan" Akane said as she hugged her pet pig closer to the area that Ranma didn't want to see Ryoga near. They'd just returned from school.

"There's more to that pig than you realize!" Ranma snarled.

Akane looked at him; P-chan was a little smaller then other black pot bellied pigs and wore a cute patterned neckerchief. Other then that, she couldn't see any difference between P-chan and other pigs. "How so? He's just a harmless little piggy and you're a bully for always beating him up" she snarled back. "Now excuse me, we're going to go take a nap"

"You're not sleeping with that thing!" Ranma ordered.

Akane turned and glared "you don't tell me what to do. The only person who decides what's good for me is, is me!" she cried and went to slam her door after her. Ranma cursed himself for losing his temper as he had promised Red that he wouldn't. He stomped into his room and tried to find her online.

Akane logged on and pmed Ray.

Red2221: Ray are you on here? I need to speak with you right away!

Ranma logged in and he got his pm. For once he couldn't handle Red's whining and really needed to vent.

Kickinbutt: Yes, I'm here but I'm in a crappy mood. I just had a fight with my friend.

Concerned with Ray, Akane forgot about her own problems.

Red2221: What's wrong?

Kickinbutt: There's this guy that my friend sleeps with, only she doesn't know that he's a guy.

Akane blushed at what Ray was implying.

Red2221: She's sleeping with someone?

Kickinbutt: Not like THAT! I mean that she shares her bed with someone occasionally and she doesn't know that he's a man.

Red2221: You mean like a cross dresser?

Kickinbutt: Something like that

Ranma had no clue how to explain it.

Red2221: You should tell her. This guy could be watching her undress.

Ranma glared in the direction of Akane's room, as if challenging Ryoga through the walls themselves.

Kickinbutt: I wouldn't put it past him. However, I swore a vow to him that I would never reveal his secret, I can't go back on my word.

Akane frowned at this; she knew that Ray was an honourable man.

Red2221: Is there anyone else that knows his secret? If so then you should have them break it to her. It isn't right to have some pervert take advantage of a young naive girl that way.

Kickinbutt: I know its killing me. I want her to know the real reason why I don't trust her friend; she thinks that I just fight with him for sport.

Red2221: You have to find a way. She'll be really upset if she finds out that you were letting her sleep with a pervert.

Kasumi frowned when she followed this conversation and tried to wonder who Ranma was referring to. No one slept with Akane on a regular basis; except for her pet pig. Kasumi wondered who the pig actually might be. She decided to get to the bottom of it and called up a friend.

"Kuno residence" said Sasuke

"Hello Sasuke, could you please tell Tatewaki that Cutiekitty's calling" Kasumi purred.

"Miss Tendo" Tatewaki said when he came on the line.

"Hello Tachi, there's a vile sorcerer bothering Akane. Would you be up to helping rescue fair maidens today?"

"Of course" he declared.

"Great, do you know where you can get a sanitation worker's overalls and a warm water hose? I'll make it worth your while; I'll give you a pair of your pigtailed goddess's underwear" she said persuasively.

"I accept my mission. What do I have to do?" he asked. Kasumi smiled and outlined her plan.

Kasumi removed clean clothing from the clothesline, folded it all up and put it into the basket. Save for one pair of Ranma's boxer shorts, these she put into a paper bag and set it aside. Then she went to talk to Akane.

Akane logged off when she heard a knock on the door and opened it; expecting it to be Ranma come to apologize. Instead it was Kasumi come to visit. Kasumi took in the sight of Akane at her desk and P-chan on the floor beneath her; she could have sworn he was looking up her baby sister's skirt.

"Akane, I understand that your pig's arrived. I want you to give him a bath before you allow him into your bed, only kami knows where he's been" Kasumi suggested. She noticed that the pig's eyes went wide when she said this.

"Okay Kasumi" Akane agreed and went to pick up P-chan, who darted away. "Where're you going baby?" she asked and managed to corner him and pick him up. As soon as he reached the hall, he leapt out of her arms and took off running. He managed to get to the front door and found it half open. He thanked Kami and then jumped out, only to be hit with a stream of hot water just as Akane reached the door.

Ryoga turned bright red, realized he was nude in public and covered himself with his hands. "R-Ryoga you're P-chan" Akane screeched.

The man dressed in sanitation worker overalls and a baseball cap touched his brim and politely said "sorry sir, I had orders to spray down the sidewalks in this area" Leaving Ryoga to wonder in a vague way; why they were using hot water for this and why the man had Kuno's face? Then he turned to Akane.

"Yes, Akane I'm P-chan. I was planning to tell you" Ryoga said and accepted the towel that Kasumi gave him.

He was surprised when Akane slapped him "you pervert, I feel sick about all the times I undressed in front of you. You never told me, leave Ryoga!" she commanded.

"But Akane" he protested.

"I said get out" she cried and Ryoga left.

Akane didn't even bother knocking on Ranma's door, she just kicked it down.

"All this time you knew I was taking a man into my bed and you never told me!" she thundered.

"I promised him on my honour as a martial artist that I wouldn't" Ranma explained.

Her eyes seemed to glisten and then she said "I understand, you're martial arts always did mean more to you then I do. That's why you can never turn down a challenge, no matter how asinine. Find another fiancée, oh that's right, you have several" she said sadly and then left.

"Akane" Ranma said with concern and went to follow her, only to be stopped by Kasumi.

"Just leave her alone for now" she advised.

Ranma read his pm from Red, who he now realized was Akane. He felt tears spring to his eyes when it said:

Red2221: You're right, he isn't worth it.

Kuno got home and opened the bag that Kasumi had smuggled out to him. His expression was decidedly puzzled when he pulled out a pair of man's orange boxer shorts, size medium.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N Yet another plot twist, don't ask me how this came about, I just write these things. Btw, the boy's nosebleed conversation is just poking fun at the puritanical views of the characters about how they are always talking about 'dating and marriage'. They seriously don't act like any teenaged boys I ever met. Believe me; I remember those hormones with feet. Sid

******

Ranma had to play the duel role as Akane ex-fiancée, rejected forever by her and as her main source of online support. Neither role he relished particularly at this low point in his life, but at least the latter allowed him to speak with her, something that she almost refused to do in real life. Oh she was still polite to him, way too polite for the normally fiery girl. The last time that he'd witnessed her temper was when she raged at her family that she refused to be forced into marriage with anyone, for any reason and should they persist, then she would leave home after college and never return.

He suffered loss of face again when she announced that they were no longer engaged to the entire school. He'd quelled any notion of them starting up the game of winning dates from Akane again. He announcing that any who participated in that would answer to him, something which Akane had politely thanked him for, rather than screaming at him that she could take care of herself.

Looking at his ex-fiancée showing more animation speaking to her friends than she'd shown him in weeks, Ranma was forced to examine his past behaviour of her and discovered that it had been pretty bad. He'd insulted her, he'd mocked her and worst was; he'd allowed her to be used as a trophy for numerous challenges without once asking her opinion before he accepted them. She'd been right about him putting his martial arts prowess before her. He resolved that that would stop immediately, so he called together his normal challengers to speak with them, including, Mousse, Kuno, Ryoga, Shampoo, Kodachi and Ukyou.

"I bet you're wondering why I called you all here?" he announced to the six confused martial artists sitting in a semi circle before him in the dojo.

"Well yes" replied Kuno "It's not like you consider any of us to be your friend"

"Bite your tongue, I'm his friend!" cried Ukyou

"I thought you were his fiancée?" asked Kuno

"I can be both his fiancée and his friend" she said primly.

Ranma turned to the female side, their battle furies were already flaring off of them to be in the other's presence. "I hope you don't mind if I ask you to join Kasumi for refreshments, while I talk to the boys for a second ladies? I'll make it worth your while" he said in his sexiest voice.

"Of course not Ran-chan" Ukyou said.

"Is okay with Shampoo" Shampoo replied.

"I suppose I best learn the kitchen I shall preside over" Kodachi said.

Once they were gone

"Boys, you're all wonderful martial artists in your right and all of you have given me a run for my money at some point or other. As you are all men of honour, I have a favour to ask of you; I want you to lay off Akane Tendo"

"She's no longer yours to claim" Ryoga replied.

"That's my point; she isn't anyone's to claim. She's a person, not a trophy, slave or toy and we've all have been treating her like that" he chided.

"I have no real interest in Akane Tendo" Mousse volunteered.

"Yet you challenged me for her hand in marriage when we first met" Ranma reminded him.

"That was just to prove a point to Shampoo" he said sheepishly.

"So what would you have done with her if you'd won? It wasn't like you even had a place to take her to, even if you wanted" Ranma asked more out of curiousity then anything.

Mousse thought for a second "I would have probably taken her on a date and then sent her home" he replied.

"That's all you would have wanted to do with Akane Tendo!" Ryoga cried in astonishment.

Ranma looked at the other two males, suspecting their answers would be completely different "And you two, what if you'd won her? What would you have expected her to do? The only non-verbal answer he received from them was a pair of nosebleeds. "I thought as much, you two make me sick!" he said with disgust. "That's why I have called us together today; I want everyone here to promise not to use her as a trophy anymore. She's a person who's entitled to her own opinions, not a party favour to be passed around"

"I suppose that Mousse never gets those thoughts about Shampoo?" Kuno said sarcastically. All three turned to critically examine the bespectacled martial artist, who blushed.......then got a nose bleed.

"You didn't have to accept our challenges when we suggested her as a prize. You could have said no" Ryoga pointed out. "Besides, she's fair game now that she rejected you" he taunted.

"Yeah, she'll be all over you P-chan, last I heard she banned you from the house" he replied. "Look I want us to come to an agreement that no one shall try to win her by martial arts of any sort. If anyone one goes after her, the only ammunition they can use is charm, wit, personality and good looks" Ranma declared.

"I'm fine with that, I'm well endowed in all those departments" Kuno replied. "And others not so apparent" he said facetiously.

"Don't forget modest too" chimed in Ryoga.

"Why be modest when I'm the perfect specimen of masculinity?" Kuno declared, causing the rest to exchange foul looks.

"That's another thing I've been wondering about. Why are we, as teenaged males, so obsessed with marriage? I mean other teenaged boys are more concerned with doing OTHER things with girls" Ranma pointed out.

"I'm not sure. Perhaps we just aren't drawn that way?" suggested Kuno (A/N Ha ha I kill myself)

"Like dating them you mean?" Ryoga asked.

"Yes amongst OTHER things" Ranma explained, he glanced at the blank looks on the other boy's faces, sighed and said "#%#ing them". Everyone in the room blushed bright red, including Ranma and started to nosebleed.

"Who would want to do THAT with a girl he wasn't married to?" asked Mousse in a shocked tone of voice

"Everyone besides us apparently" Ranma said. "Look, I have another proposition for you. You guys need to gain experience with girls and I have girls to spare, there's three of you and three of them. I suggest that we do a temporary matching"

"Why should we help you?" Ryoga protested.

"Just think, Shampoo, Ukyou and Kodachi are all extremely pretty and not only would you get to spend time with them, but you could possibly discover what women want" Ranma said persuasively.

"Who gets who?" demanded Mousse.

"Well, the most obvious choices would be you with Shampoo, Kuno with Ukyou and Ryoga with Kodachi; Kuno can hardly be paired with his own sister after all. What I propose, if the girls agree to it, is that you live together as husband and wife" Ranma suggested. Seeing the nosebleeds starting again, he added "THAT is not included in the deal" he declared.

"Sounds good" Ryoga said.

"I agree" said Mousse, rubbing his hands together in anticipation.

"That sounds acceptable" Kuno replied.

"Good lets get the girls back here then" Ranma said with a grin; everything was falling into place.

"Ladies, I can't marry any of you!" Ranma declared nastily. "None of you have received proper bridal training and I have high standards of what I expect in a wife"

"What you mean, Ranma?" demanded Shampoo.

"Yes what do you mean Sugar?" said Ukyou

"I mean is that I don't want some girl who sits there uselessly while I do all the cooking and cleaning myself" he sneered.

"How dare you, we've all received bridal training!" cried Ukyou.

"What all these bloody tissues for?" Shampoo wondered a loud.

"Prove it" Ranma answered.

"How? I'll prove it in any way that you care to name!" Kodachi challenged.

"Very well, you live as husband and wife with a groom of my choice for two weeks and they get to evaluate you" Ranma suggested.

All the girls blushed "we don't have to....with THEM?" Ukyou asked hesitantly.

"No they sleep in a different room and you'll be evaluated on your cook skills, cleaning skills and general thoughtfulness towards your husband. It would be arranged as so: Mousse and Shampoo already live together, Kuno would move into Ukyou's guestroom and Ryoga into the mansion with Kodachi. You can only eat food that you prepared, going out for dinner shall be limited to once a week and household chores are to be divided as you choose. Are you girls up to the challenge?" Ranma demanded.

"Wait a minute, why isn't one of the grooms you?" demanded Kodachi, glaring dubiously at Ryoga.

"I would be biased towards that girl. This is the only fair way I can think of" Ranma explained.

"What we win?" Shampoo asked.

"A date with the man of your dreams" Ranma said with a winning smile.

All the girls went off to discuss Ranma's proposal. "Okay, we agree to your terms but no hanky panky at all, not even kissing" Ukyou said, acting as spokesperson of the group.

"That's acceptable" replied Ryoga, acting as the spokesperson for the boys.

"Great! Congratulations on your nuptials; you may kiss your bride!" Ranma proclaimed.

"Mousse not dare!" Shampoo warned.

"That goes double for me" replied Ukyou and they all filed out in reluctant pairs.

Ranma danced for joy and praised his ingenuity; this way the girls would be kept away from him and the guys would be too busy to hit on Akane. Now all he had to do was figure out a way to get Akane back, he missed having her as his fiancée.

Mousse and Shampoo

"Isn't this a wonderful idea Shampoo? Just think, I'm your Airen" Mousse said happily.

"Yes, Shampoo so happy she make special dinner for Airen" she said sourly as she leaned over the meat counter in the Chinese grocery store that they were in. "That one" she told the attendant "chop off head for me please?" she asked him sweetly.

Mousse gasped when he chopped the head off the white duck carcass with a huge butcher knife. "What the matter Airen, Mousse no like duck?" Shampoo asked sweetly, noticing how pale he looked.

Chattin' Time

Ranma was still Akane's BFF on the chat forum and had been comforting the girl and learning how she viewed him at the same time.

Kickinbutt: How're you holding up Red?

Red2221: It's kind of awkward with him living with me.

Kickinbutt: Would you like to talk about it?

Red2221: What's to talk about? He has a million girls after him, he's rude and arrogant and totally obsessed with accepting any martial arts challenge that comes his way no matter how stupid

Ranma preened a bit at the first part and frowned a bit at the second part.

Kickinbutt: Then why do you like him?

Akane thought about this

Red2221: He's charming and intelligent when you get to know him. There's just something about him.

Kickinbutt: That he's handsome?

Akane frowned and wondered if perhaps Ray was gay

Red2221: Yes and no, it's more like his take charge attitude and inner sweetness that he tries to hide. He always seems so gruff when it comes to showing emotions, but he's always there when people need him.

Kickinbutt: Even you? I thought you said he was an insensitive lout.

Red2221: No I said he was a tad clueless, not insensitive. I've seen him go from fighting someone one minute and consoling them if they're sad the next minute. It is just him. I really don't know how to describe it.

Kickinbutt: Then you do like him?

Red2221: It's impossible not to like him. He just sort of grew on me.

Kickinbutt: Like fungus?

Red2221: I don't think he'd like to be compared to that, but yes.

Kickinbutt: Do you miss him?

Akane thought about that

Red2221: I miss hanging out with him, but I don't miss being with him.

Now it was Ranma's true to frown

Kickinbutt: Why not?

Red2221: Well, I felt like we were both trapped into a situation that neither one wanted to be in. Then there were people demanding that we had to be together and giving us no time alone to decide for ourselves. It was like we were both endangered species in a zoo that people put into the same cage to force them to mate.

Ranma had to admit that it was a pretty accurate description

Kickinbutt: Don't you think that perhaps he liked you for yourself?

Red2221: Yes after martial arts challenges and all things martial arts related. I just wish that he had sometimes taken an interest in things I might enjoy, or even made some effort to get to know me.

Ranma felt bad about this

Kickinbutt: Perhaps he never thought about that because you were being crammed down his throat too?

Akane paused

Red2221: I realized that, but that should have made us band together and opposed our oppressors rather than him turning on me. And how about the childish name calling?

Ranma whispered "you're right Akane, I'm sorry. None of this was your fault"

Kickinbutt: Perhaps that's the only way he knows how to talk to you?

Red2221: Who needs him then? I don't want to know that I'm ugly and uncoordinated. He even insults my martial arts!

Kickinbutt: Well, it sounds like he grew up without proper parenting. Could that be one of the reasons?

Red2221: True with his father, he might as well have been raised by wolves, only the wolves protect their young, not throw them to other wolves.

Ranma frowned at this

Kickinbutt: So this is it? You want nothing more to do with him?

Red2221: Until he makes his mind up about what we are to each, then yes

Akane heard Kasumi calling them to dinner

Red2221: I have to go eat dinner, perhaps chat to you later.

Kickinbutt: You can count on it

Red2221: No, I can count on you and that's a rare thing these days

Kickinbutt: I'll always be here for you Red

Ukyou and Kuno

"Dinner" she said plopping a plate in front of him

Kuno looked distastefully at it "what is it?"

Ukyou sat down and dug into her own food "okonomiyaki" she explained.

"You mean you make this fast food all day long and then you still want to eat it for dinner?" he asked incredulously.

"I'm sorry that it isn't the Lobster Thermidor, not everyone has their own personal chef" she snarled at the spoiled rich boy.

"We could just move into my home until this travesty is over and both enjoy that for dinner tonight!" he snarled back. "Then I wouldn't have to sleep in a room the size of a closet!"

"Oh no, I'm following the rules. I'm not losing to one of those hussies because you're having space issues. Now eat your dinner!" she snapped, then remembered that she was being evaluated by Kuno and added "darling"

He picked at his food "I'll eat it, but that doesn't mean I have to enjoy it" Kuno said grouchily.

"We just have to live together for two weeks, for better or for worse, until then we're the perfect married couple. Got it? We're both in this together" Ukyou said in a threatening tone of voice.

"I loath you woman" Kuno said.

"That goes double for me Sugar" replied Ukyou

"I like pretty, feminine girls" Kuno pointed out smugly.

He couldn't comprehend why Ukyou burst out laughing when he said this.


	6. Chapter 6

Ranma looked at Akane with appreciation; she had fetching sparkly red barrettes in her hair and wore a knee length red dress with a black collar, which fastened at the waist with a wide black cloth belt. "You look very nice Akane" he complimented her.

"Thanks Ranma" she replied in a rather cold voice.

Noticing how she was standing by the door and appeared to be waiting for someone, he asked "Are you going somewhere?"

"Yes, I have a date" she replied.

Ranma's head swiveled on his neck so fast that he almost gave himself whiplash. "A what?" he demanded.

"A date" said Akane. "Not everyone in this world thinks that I'm unsexy and uncute"

Ranma balled his hands into fists in an effort to calm himself "Do I know the guy?" he asked in a dangerous tone of voice. He thought that he'd cleared the deck of all of his rivals to Akane's affection.

"His name is Auggie and I met him at my flower arranging class, not that it's any of your business" Akane replied primly.

Ranma picture a wimpy guy who looked like Gosunkugi and burst out laughing "What kind of a name is Auggie?"

"His full name is Augustus Harden III and he's a dual citizen of Japan and America, born here. His father owns a huge chain of flower shops, which Auggie plans to take over after he graduates college" Akane explained.

Just then there was a knock on the door and Akane eagerly opened it, the person on the doorstep almost filled the doorframe. Ranma's jaw dropped. Auggie looked like a non-green Incredible Hulk, his muscles seemed to have muscles and he was easily well over six feet. Long blonde hair cascaded down his back and his turquoise eyes seemed to hit Ranma with the force of laser beams. "Hi Auggie" Akane said. Auggie turned his gaze towards her, giving Ranma just enough time to register that Auggie's face was just right combination of pretty and handsome.

"Hello Akane, you look lovely" replied Auggie in a voice that rivaled silk. He held out a bouquet of breathtakingly arranged yellow roses in a hand as large as a catcher's mitt. "You said that your favourite colour is yellow, so I put together this bouquet for you" he explained.

"Why thank you, they're lovely. You're so thoughtful" she said smiling up at him.

Ranma sourly wondered if the petit Akane even came up to Auggie's waist.

Auggie looked at Ranma again "I'm sorry friend, I didn't catch your name" he said politely.

"I'm Ra....." Ranma began and then Akane cut him off.

"He's a guy who freeloads off my family. Now come of silly, we don't want to be late for the movie" Akane chided, towing the Adonis away by one massive bicep.

Once they were gone Ranma stood there seething, he was surprised when Kasumi whispered as she passed him "a man should fight for his woman". Ranma realized this to be the truth. 'But how to get her away from the pretty boy' he questioned himself and than smiled when an idea occurred to him. Flinging a glass of water over his head, he knocked on Nabiki's door. "I need to borrow some clothes" Ranma demanded of the startled girl.

Auggie was enjoying his date with Akane. She'd gone to the washroom when a hot redhead wearing only a skimpy black denim skirt and purple tank top approached their table. "Hi big fella, can I have a seat?" she asked and sat down before he could answer.

"I'm on a date" he replied nervously.

"Yes with my fiancée" the obviously feminine person said.

"Y-your fiancée?" Auggie stammered, his eyes going wide with shock.

"Yep, my name is Ranma Saotome. You can ask Akane about me" she said causally.

"Ranma what're you doing here?!" Akane demanded.

"She says that she's your fiancée" replied a confused Auggie.

"Ex-fiancé" Akane corrected.

Auggie stood up "I support homosexual rights as much as the next guy, but I really don't like girls who aren't into me or are bisexual. I think that I should go home. I'm sorry, but the date is over Akane" he said gently.

"But Auggie, Ranma's a guy!" cried Akane.

Auggie got an eyeful of Ranma's mostly exposed chest and said "I'm sorry Akane, I'm just not into yuri" and walked away.

"Ranma I'm going to kill you" yelled Akane and proceeded to chase the giggling girl.

Shampoo and Mousse

"Airen comfortable?" Shampoo asked as she slid a dish of fish towards him. Mousse looked distastefully around the cage she'd locked him in, at the rope binding his wings to his sides and quacked angrily.

"Now, now Mu Mu Chan. Not so bad, I give you nice straw for bed, plenty water and food. Now Shampoo must go Japanese class and no want you follow. I let out when get back" she promised and closed the door.

Mousse hung his duck head in despair, then reached in amongst his feathers, and started trying to jimmy the lock.

Ukyo and Kuno

"Hey Kuno, thanks for using all the hot water this morning" snapped Ukyou as she whipped a slice of toast at him.

"There's more of me to wash" he replied in amusement and easily caught the projectile bread.

"Yes, but you also didn't clean the sink after you shaved!" she pointed out.

"You have to wash sinks?" Kuno asked blankly, clearly that concept had never occurred to him.

"Yes, I'm not your maid, if you make a mess, you have to clean it up" Ukyou snarled.

"Duly noted" he replied and eyed her male uniform and wrinkled his nose in distaste. "You know, they do make female uniforms for Furinkan High School students?"

Ukyou glared right back "At least I wear a uniform; you go around dressed like a freak and walk around barefoot all day! You know that people own dogs and there are pigeons that crap all over the sidewalk and you're stepping in it? I certainly hope you wash your feet as soon as you get home each night"

"You dare insult Tatewaki Kuno, you, you cross dresser. I am wearing a Kendo Uniform and it commands respect"

"It commands that people laugh at you" Ukyou cried. "You look like a jackass in that thing!"

"You will apologize right now underclassman!" Kuno demanded.

"Is that some sort of crack about my taste in uniforms?" she asked.

"It most certainly was" he replied.

They glared at each other, and then calmed down.

"I'm sorry husband darling, here's your lunch" Ukyou said handing him a paper bag.

He opened it and peered into it "what is it?"

"Chicken salad on twelve grain bread, an apple and carrot sticks" she replied.

"A proper Japanese lunch is served in a bento box and shines like jewels when it's opened" Kuno said.

"I don't have time to prepare finicky lunch items, I go to school fulltime and run my restaurant until late at night" she snarled. "Just be glad I made you lunch at all! Not everyone has a chef to prepare their lunches for them"

"The person who makes my lunches is Greta, our housekeeper who's been with us since before I was born and is almost like a mother to me" Kuno snarled.

"What's her last name then?" Ukyou inquired.

"Why it's…." Kuno started and then realized that he didn't know it.

"I rest my case. Come on lets go to school Sugar" she said leading him towards the door. "Don't tell your friends about our little arrangement; I don't want them to think that we're doing the hot and nasty. I have my reputation to protect" she said.

Kuno thought about how his fellow kendoists would laugh if they knew that he was living in a fake marriage with the cross dressing girl "I wouldn't dream of it" he replied sourly.

Kodachi and Ryoga

Kodachi watched as Ryoga flung himself down on a priceless antique chair and put up his feet on an equally irreplaceable end table. She noticed that he was eating a dripping sandwich off of a plate from their expensive china collection, reserved only for visiting royalty. She glared daggers at him; they'd been fighting over dinner. He seemed clueless as to what fork to use and kept using the wrong ones. He almost caused her to faint with embarrassment when he got a fight with her servant when he tried to take Ryoga's salad fork away.

"What are you eating?" she demanded.

"Chili and cheese on a bun" he replied happily.

"How could you possibly be hungry again? We just ate a few hours ago" she said in an exasperated tone of voice.

"All those tiny little courses failed to fill me up. I'm used to making up something on the road, stuffing my gut and going to bed early" he replied.

"Where did you even get that revolting looking thing?" she asked.

"I made it, I had the ingredients for the chili in my pack, so I asked your chef if I could use his kitchen" Ryoga explained, taking another bite of the sloppy mess.

"Gaston let you use his kitchen!" she cried. Kodachi was shocked, he'd once made her cry when she was ten and he'd caught her trying to make cookies.

"Sure, as long as he got to try a sandwich" Ryoga said.

"You mean that Gaston Leflore IIII, whose grandfather founded the world famous Leflore cooking school, the most sought after chef in all of Europe, whose palate is renowned throughout Paris is in the kitchen eating one of your disgusting sandwiches?" cried Kodachi.

"Yep, go see for yourself" replied Ryoga.

Kodachi soundlessly pushed open the kitchen door and peeked in. Sure enough, her white clad chef was happily munching on a dripping sandwich "Gaston!" she cried in shock.

He quickly hid it behind his back and replied "Oui Mademoiselle Kodachi?"

"Just try it" Ryoga said, thrusting it at her. She took a tentative bite and groaned in ecstasy, it was like tasting heaven itself! "It's the mushrooms; I pick them wild, they make the best chili" he explained.

Gaston brightened at the normally haughty girl's reaction to the sandwich "Un sandwich pour Mademoiselle Kodachi coming up" he said making one for her. All three of them sat in the kitchen eating their sandwiches and talking. Kodachi never knew that Gaston was married, let alone that he had three children.

Chattin' Time

Akane came home and logged on in a fury, she hadn't been able to keep up with Ranma.

She pmed to Ray

Red2221: I really, really need to chat you with Ray

Kickinbutt: What'd he do to upset you this time?

Akane thought about what to say

Red2221: He ruined my date!

Kickinbutt: Since when are you dating other guys? I thought that you'd just broke up with him.

Red2221: I haven't been on a date with another guy and I wanted to see what it was like

Kickinbutt: Perhaps he acted that way because he was hurt by how quickly he was replaced?

Red2221: The guy I went on a date with wasn't special to me; he was just a nice guy

Kickinbutt: Did you explain that to your friend in advance?

Akane thought about it and felt kind of bad how she'd sprung it on Ranma

Red2221: I guess I was a little harsh with him. He found out when my date showed up at the door. But it shouldn't matter, he wasn't into me anyway

Kickinbutt: You sure about that? Sometimes your heart sees more than your eyes.

Akane thought back on her relationship with Ranma and started remembering all the large and small things that he did for her over the past year. The things implied, but left unsaid.

Red2221: I guess he does like me. I guess I acted foolish, I'm not even sure that I'm ready to date yet. I just wanted to have an experience that was purely of my own choosing and not influenced by family.

Ranma felt bad when she said this. He just felt so jealous about her going out with the He-Man

Kickinbutt: I'm sure that your friend is sorry about how he acted. You should talk to him

Red2221: But I'm still mad at him. How do I know that talking to him won't encourage him to do this again?

Kickinbutt: So it's completely over between the two of you?

Red2221: Yes, no, perhaps. I'm not really sure. I doubt that he missed me.

"Yes I do" replied Ranma

Kickinbutt: I'm sure he does

Red2221: How do you know?

Kickinbutt: I sure would if I was in his shoes. You seem like a special kind of girl to me

Red2221: You always know what to say to cheer my up!

Kickinbutt: Glad I could help

Red2221: Looks like I have to go talk to someone, bye Ray

Kickinbutt: Good luck Red

Ranma read this, had his computer off and he was pretending to do his homework within seconds.

"Come in" he said when she knocked on the door. "Akane I want to apologize….." he started and stopped when she hugged him tightly.

"No, I'm sorry. I should have warned you about Auggie. I wanted to go out with him to announce my independence to our fathers, not to hurt you. I will date again in the future, but only after we're both over this little infatuation of ours. I do still care about you" she promised him.

"I care about you too Akane" he said. He hugged her back while his brain supplied 'I love you'

Mousse and Shampoo

Shampoo returned to the Nekohanten to find Mousse waiting for her at their dining table.

"Have to study, no want play house tonight" she said impatiently.

"Look, I'm sorry how I've been so clingy and needy. Shampoo, can we start all over again or go back to being friends like we were before when we were young?"

"I not sure Mousse, I not love you. Only like you" she said hesitantly.

"Look, let's not talk about emotions at the moment. I've made dinner and your great-grandmother's out for the evening. Let's just eat and you can tell me about how your class was, and then I can help you with your homework if you want" he suggested and pulled a chair out.

"You mean?" Shampoo said.

"I mean it; we'll just talk about anything you want. Perhaps you can even explain to me where you managed to find all those bananas to drown me in when we were ten? Bananas don't even grow in China" he said handing her a napkin.

She laughed at the memory and that broke the ice "I use great-grandmother spell, but made mistake, supposed to be poison ivy, not bananas" She giggled at the expression on Mousse's face and decided it was kind of fun hanging out with him this way.


	7. Chapter 7

Akane kept on stealing glances at Ranma, he'd just bathed so his hair hung loose in damp waves, he wore only a bathrobe which was just open enough to expose a yummy glimpse of his well developed chest. Though Akane would never deign to admit it, she thought that Ranma was one of the handsomest men she'd ever met. She thought that he looked his best when he didn't realize that he was being observed because he didn't flex and act like a bit of a fool then.

His boyish features were starting to lose their baby fat and soon he would be heading towards manhood and Akane welcomed the changes in him. She felt a pang that she might not even know him then as there would be no reason for him to stick around now that they were no longer engaged. She tried to imagine life without him and couldn't. Outside of the strutting and pompous attitude, Ranma was a decent guy with a kind heart. Given time to mature, he would make a wonderfully loyal husband to whoever would be lucky to get him and eventually a wonderful father. Not for the first time Akane regretted her rejection of him, she wondered what their relationship would have been like if it had developed on its own without the interference of others.

"Mrs. Saotome" she whispered under her breath.

"Did you say something Akane?" Ranma inquired.

She blushed "No, no just talking to myself" she said quickly. Ranma just looked at her questioningly and then went back to brushing his hair, not noticing Akane's eyes devouring him. His brushing his hair caused the muscles in his chest to dance.

Mousse and Shampoo

Shampoo stirred the Ramen and snuck a glance at Mousse; she had to admit that she was rather enjoying their fake marriage. He was just talking to her like he used to when they were friends and not whining at her as he presently did. Even in a fake marriage he seemed more relaxed and comfortable around her.

He'd been working out on the roof wearing just a pair of jogging pants, so she had a rather nice view when he came in. He rubbed himself down with a towel and seemed to be favouring his left shoulder a bit. "Mousse hurt himself?" she asked.

"I think I pulled something, I'll be fine" he replied.

He sucked in his breath when he felt her small, warm hand exploring the offending area.

"You have huge knot there, you sit down I massage out" she said pointing firmly at a chair.

"It's okay Shampoo, It'll loosen when I shower" he replied.

"Sit!" she said, he quickly did. He moaned when she massaged his sore aching muscles, it felt like they were turning to butter under her knowing hands. Her next words caused him to tense up though.

"You start fill out, shoulders wider, chest broader. You look more like your father every day. Shampoo too young to really remember him well, but my mother said she had crush on his when she young. He was handsomest man in village, all girls willing to take dive if he try defeat them but he only want your mother. They say he bewitch with rare green eyes, you have eyes too" she said as she kneaded his arms. "He wore hair long too"

Mousse felt confused by what she was saying "my mother could never bring herself to do more then trim my hair, I got into that habit as well. I guess it was her way of honouring him. Why are you telling me this Shampoo?"

"Shampoo thought Mousse should know" she replied. She brushed his hair back into place and said "I go pick up soya sauce, we talk later"

Mousse realized that she'd just told him that she thought he was handsome in a round about way. "Shampoo" he said to stop her. She turned around. "Thank you" he replied, she gave him a friendly smile and left.

Kuno and Ukyou

Tatewaki had agreed to pick up some food for Ukyou after school as she had had to go straight home as she had the entire restaurant booked for a private party. He stepping into the large grocery store and froze. He'd never been in one before and the sheer size of the store was a tad overwhelming. He looked dubiously at his list and wondered where to even begin looking for the items there. "Watch it pal!" a woman snarled as she almost rear ended him with her cart. He jumped out of the way, wondering where to get one of those contraptions.

"Move it buddy" snapped a man, whose path Tatewaki was blocking.

Again he moved, he turned his head when someone starting laughing in amusement. A twenty something woman with long dark hair stood in front of him "you must be a new husband" she observed.

"How can you tell?" he asked her.

"You have that deer caught in the headlights look to you" she explained. "My husband used to look the same way when we first started shopping for groceries together. Would you like some help? My name is Akira" she offered.

"Please" Tatewaki almost pleaded. "My name is Tatewaki"

"Here let me see your list" she said reaching out her hand. Gratefully, he handed it to her. "There are not too many things on here, you can just put them on this side of my cart" she offered.

"Thank you" he said in relief.

As they shopped they talked "how long have you been married for?" he asked Akira.

"We got married at eighteen, so ten years" she replied. "We have two children that my husband's watching while I'm here. How about you?" she asked.

Kuno thought about what to say "only a few days" he admitted.

"What do you wife and yourself do for a living?" she asked." My husband's a contractor and I manage a candy shop"

"My wife owns and operates a restaurant that she's the chef of and I have family money that I control" he admitted.

"Your wife seriously owns a restaurant? How old is she?" Akira asked.

"Sixteen" he replied. "We also go to school fulltime"

Akira whistled "sounds like you're married to Wonder Woman if she can do all that and take care of you as well"

Kuno suddenly looked at Ukyou in a different way, he had just taken these parts of her for granted "yes, she's impressive" he admitted. "Now what's the next item on the list?" he asked

"Tampons" Akira read out loud. Kuno groaned and mentally kicked Ukyou; he could hear her cackling as she wrote that on the list. "What type does she use?" she asked.

"I don't know" Kuno said and wondered if his face was glowing red.

"Well, does she have a light or heavy flow?" inquired Akira.

"I don't know. Does that matter?" he asked.

"Well that would give us an indication of what size to get" she explained.

"They come in different sizes?" said the baffled Kuno.

"Okay would you describe your wife as being a big woman?" Akira inquired.

Kuno was just glad that there was finally something he could answer "no she's slim and athletic"

Akira pulled a box out and dropped it into their shared cart "slim but designed for medium flow with a plastic applicator. I know that they're bad for the environment, but nothing beats plastic applicators" she explained. Kuno could only nod his head as if in understanding. "Now time to check out" she said and showed him where to pay for his purchases, the line ups baffled him.

"Paper or plastic?" the cashier asked. Kuno just looked at Akira.

"Plastic, the handles make it easier to carry" she explained.

"I have to carry this stuff!" he said in a startled voice.

"Yes, unless you can figure out some way to make it float along beside you" Akira replied in amusement.

Kuno thanked the kindly stranger then fumed as he carried to two large bags home. He dropped the bags off in the kitchen, as that seemed to be the logical place to put them and then went to find Ukyou to tear a strip off of her for humiliating him that way. He was surprised to find the normally high energy girl lying on the couch asleep. "Ukyou, I thought that you said you were preparing for the party?" he asked her.

"Just feeling a little dizzy" she said and struggled to sit up. Feeling slightly concerned, he touched her forehead to find that she was burning up.

"You have a fever, you should go to bed" he suggested.

"I can't, I've had this engagement party booked for weeks! I don't want to disappoint them and I can't afford to lose the income"

"Call your relief chef" Kuno suggested.

"I don't have one, I'm the chef" she said weakly.

"That's good sound planning" he said sourly.

"I can't trust just anyone to make okonomiyaki" she said in outrage.

"I have a suggestion, I just have to make a phone call" Kuno said, he pulled out his cell phone and dialed the mansion. "Kodachi I have an emergency situation here at the restaurant. Can you spare Gaston for tonight?" he asked.

"What's wrong with my almost sister-in-law brother dear?" Kodachi asked facetiously.

"I think it's the flu" Kuno replied.

"Not a problem, Ryoga's making beef stew for tonight" she assured him.

"Ryoga's cooking at our home!" Kuno said in surprise. "But what about Gaston, he hates people using his kitchen?"

"Gaston's bleeding Ryoga dry of recipes like a vampire, Ryoga's a bit of a travel food genius" she explained. "I'll send Gaston right over"

Ukyou stared at the white clad Frenchman, complete with chef hat and said "you've got to be kidding me!" Gaston was a handsomely thin man in his mid-forties, of middle height with dark eyes, dark hair cut short and graying at his temples.

"Mademoiselle Ukyou, sorry I may call you zat, non?" he inquired

"Oui, I mean yes" Ukyou said finding his half French and heavily accenting Japanese way of speaking addictive.

"When I leave France, I come to Japan and seek out cooking masters. I ask if they train moi and zey agree, one of zem was famous okonomiyaki chef and he nice man and teach all zat he know to Gaston. Gaston love to learn new ways of cooking and have tres bien memory" Gaston explained.

"You were trained by my father?" she said in surprise.

"Oui not ze first time we met, you were un bebe at the time. Un bebe c'est charment, votre father very proud of you. Perhaps tonight you let Gaston cook as votre pere taught?" he said persuasively.

Ukyou felt really ill, so she agreed. She was surprised when Kuno helped her to stand and led her into her bedroom "where do you keep your sleepwear?" he asked her after he sat her upon the bed. Weakly she pointed to her trunk; he bent down and selected a thin white cotton nightgown.

"Change into this, you need something that will allow your body to cool down, your pajamas will only make you sweat" he explained." I'll be outside until you change" he assured her. He went to check on the revelers downstairs and noted that they seemed well pleased with Gaston as substitute chef. Then he stopped by the kitchen to retrieve a bowl of cold water and a facecloth. He wasn't too surprised when Ukyou ran past him in a flutter of white headed for the washroom; he simply followed her in and held her hair back while she made unhappy puking sounds. Kuno didn't even think about her protesting when he scooped her up and cuddled her close while he carried her to bed, Ukyou was too glad of the feeling of strong arms around her so she cuddled back into him. He lay her down and arranged the covers over her "get some rest" he suggested. He was surprised when she grabbed his arm when he went to leave.

"Could you stay with me until I fall asleep?" asked the blushing girl.

"Of course" Kuno said sitting on the bed beside her and blushed himself when she pushed him back and snuggled into him like he was a large, awkwardly shaped pillow, until her head was cushioned on his breast. Glad he was fully dressed; he brought his arms up around her and stroked her hair until she went to sleep. He lay back listening to her light breathing and considered her. He'd never really noticed Ukyou except that she had a smart mouth and was always chasing Ranma around. He had to admit that he found her attractive and found her charming in a gruff sort of way. He liked fighting with her, her fiery temper was a thing of beauty and her sharp wit made her a wonderful adversary. He'd come to respect her for both her intelligence and her independence. Yet, he liked it when she showed her softer side as she rarely did to him. Right now that she was at her most vulnerable didn't diminish her in his eyes, he remembered taking care of Kodachi when she was young and how she loved being held by her big brother when she was ill. He imagined that to be true of most females and was happy to oblige Ukyou if she needed the comfort his larger body could provide for her. He vowed that he would leave so she wouldn't wake up confused to find him in her bed, then fell asleep too, finding her body warmth pleasing.

Ukyou woke up startled and still ill in the middle of the to realize that Kuno was in bed with her, she quickly took stock of the situation and relaxed when she realized that they were both clothed, the way that he held her wasn't suggestive and the nightgown she wore wasn't sexy in the least. She remembered asking him to hold her and relaxed, too comfortable to move. She hugged him tighter and went back to sleep.

Kodachi and Ryoga

Kodachi was surprised when she found her friends gazing out of a window in school and whispering. "What's going on?" she asked them.

"There's a guy down there that's a major babe" her friend explained with a blush. Eager to see this mystery man, Kodachi nudged her way towards the window.

"Ryoga?" she exclaimed with surprise.

"You know him, will you introduce me?" the girl nearest her asked.

"He's staying with me" Kodachi explained. Her mind was reeling at her friend's reaction to him, of course she thought him attractive in a weird-dressing sort of way, but she hadn't acknowledged the extent of his good looks.

"He could stay with me as long as he wanted" the girl said "the boy's stacked!"

"You will cease to ogle my houseguest" ordered the suddenly territorial Kodachi and went downstairs to meet him.

"Ryoga what're you doing here?" she asked him.

"I brought you your lunch, you forgot it" he explained.

"That's so sweet, how did you even find the place?" she asked.

"I borrowed Gaston's cell phone, it has GSP navigation on it and then I did this" he said holding up his hands to reveal the right and left written on them. "I took no chances as I wanted to be here in time for you to have your lunch" he explained.

Kodachi was deeply touched and still conscious of the female eyes devouring him. "I have a free period. Would you like to take a walk?" she asked him.

"Sure" he replied.

"So what's your family like?" she asked him while they walked.

"Both of my parents are still alive, and I have a younger brother that I haven't seen for over a year" Ryoga replied.

"Why's that?" Kodachi asked him.

"I can't find my way home" Ryoga replied blushing with embarrassment.

"Would you like if I took you there?" she asked with a blush of her own.

"You'd do that for me!" he cried.

"Of course, I like you" she said still blushing.

"I like you too" Ryoga said, blushing even darker and refusing to look at her.

"So why do you always wear the same clothes?" she said to change the subject.

"I just need something to keep me warm when I camp and that's comfortable" Ryoga explained.

"That and you need to go home get some other clothes" she teased him.

"There's that too" he replied rubbing the back of his head self-consciously.

Kodachi noticed that they were passing a men's clothing store and grabbed Ryoga's arm "let's go" she insisted and dragging him inside.

"Ms. Kuno, your friend's ready" the sales manager said. Ryoga walked forward shyly, Kodachi's jaw dropped, he wore a dark blue collared shirt, blue jeans and a leather jacket. He looked amazing.

"We'll take it" she said before he could protest and put it on her credit card.

"Don't you think I look rather more exposed then usual?" Ryoga asked tactfully, glancing behind him at the place in question and then significantly down at his suddenly uberly muscular chest.

"You look gorgeous" she assured him, then blushed.

"You think so?" he said feeling shy.

"Yes" she replied, then noticed a movie poster "oh, I've been dying to see this movie" she said to distract him.

"I wouldn't mind seeing it either, like Friday night perhaps?" Ryoga suggested.

Kodachi realized that she was playing with her ponytail, something that she did when she got nervous and made herself stop "are you asking me out on a date?" she inquired

"No, no I just thought we could go together as friends" he assured her.

"True, I can't go with you because I have a fiancé, but if we go as friends then I can" she reasoned. "I'd love to" she replied.

"Great, I'll see you at home" Ryoga said when he dropped her off at school; he pecked her on the cheek, blushed and then darted away.

Kodachi touched the area where he pecked her with a slightly goofy grin on her face. Then remembered that his bandana was still in her purse, on a whim she removed the red ribbon from her hair and tied it there in its place.

Chattin' Time

Kickinbutt: I got your pm Red, what wrong?

Red2221: I think I made a mistake in dumping him; I miss him really badly.

Ranma did a silently 'yes' and typed.

Kickinbutt: But I thought that he drove you insane?

Red2221: He did, he does, but I can't picture life without him. He's gotten under my skin.

Ranma wanting to take the bull by the horns, typed.

Kickinbutt: Do you love him?

Red2221: I don't know? I don't know what love feels like.

Ranma thought about how he felt about Akane.

Kickinbutt: You feel happy because they are, you miss them when they aren't around and sometimes you can't sleep thinking about them. Then there's the goofy grin that you get when you see them.

Red2221: That does kind of sound like the way I feel about him. Perhaps I do love him Ray. But there's another problem; I kind of have a crush on you.

Ranma got annoyed about the fact that Akane had a crush on another guy, even if it was just himself.

Kickinbutt: You don't even know what I look like

Red2221: I know that it's a little silly, but I feel like I already know you

Kickinbutt: I feel like I already know you too Red.

Red2221: I might love him, but you're the sort of guy that I've always dreamed about meeting, someone who's sweet, intelligent and insightful. You have no idea how much you've helped me lately. You're the one nice guy in a world full of perverts and that makes you so special to me.

Kickinbutt: Red, I'm just your average guy.

Red2221: I bet there is nothing average about you, I bet you're gorgeous.

Kickinbutt: I'm fairly cute I guess.

Red2221: I bet you're more then that

Kickinbutt: Guilty as charged.

Red2221: Are you willing to send me your email address?

Kickinbutt: Of course, but do you live in Nerima, Tokyo?

Red2221: I'm closer then you think


	8. Chapter 8

Sorry about the confusion yesterday, I don't have office word on my home computer as my husband just did a full system reinstall and hasn't put it back on yet. Therefore I am reduced to using wordpad if I wish to write and have to cut and paste it onto an old document in my document manager. Which I did; then published the wrong one. Oopsy daisy, my beer was going down really well last night :)

******

Kickinbutt: Are you sure that you really want to meet me in person? What if you don't like me? Then our relationship would be ruined.

Red2221: Don't you want to meet me?

Ranma thought about it, he was worried about her accusing him of deceiving her. He never meant for this to go as far as it did, but he loved having this connection with her. He loved her.

Kickinbutt: Of course I do, I'm just worried that you'll be disappointed. I'm not who you think I am.

Red2221: I think that you're one of the nicest guys on this planet, there's no way that you could disappoint me.

Kickinbutt: You'd be surprised.

Red2221: I like surprises, my birthday's coming up and I would you to meet me as present to me.

Ranma had been saving up some money for a nice present for Akane's seventeenth birthday.

Kickinbutt: In that case, I have to agree

Red2221: I have a favourite place to meet; it's in a small park

Kickinbutt: The one beside the cemetery that your mother's buried in at the duck pond?

Akane blinked in surprise

Red2221: When did I tell you that?

Kickinbutt: A while ago. Would three o'clock on Saturday afternoon be good for you?

Red2221: Yes, that would be wonderful. It's a date!

Kickinbutt: I hope you won't be disappointed.

Red2221: I guarantee that I won't be

"About freaking time" Kasumi muttered while she monitored their conversation.

Kodachi and Ryoga

Kuno let himself into the mansion to pick up some clothes and goggled in astonishment to find his sister sitting on a brunette man's lap and making out with him.

Jumping to conclusions he yelled. "Ranma, how could you? We had an agreement and now I find you here dallying with my sister!" Both people jumped and turned flaming faces on the irate Kendoist.

"Brother dear, we aren't violating any rules. You know my husband Ryoga" Kodachi explained.

Now it was Kuno's turn to blush "sorry my mistake. Carry on with what you were doing. I didn't recognize Ryoga without his signature clothing" he explained.

"I couldn't have him going around looking like hobo" Kodachi said fondly, causing Ryoga to blush. "Now we're going to go visit his parents for a few days" she informed Kuno.

"You're really taking this fake marriage stuff seriously" he observed.

"Aren't you?" she asked, noticing him blushing. "Why brother dear, have you developed a little crush on Miss Kuonji?"

"No way. She's not my type at all" he protested.

"If you say so. Come Ryoga, the yacht should be ready" Kodachi said and pulled him towards the door.

"I can't blame you man, Ukyou's cute" Ryoga called over his shoulder to the blushing older boy, just to rub it in.

Kodachi was surprised how cute Ryoga's family residence was, it was well tended and had a beautiful garden around it. "Someone's got a green thumb" she remarked.

"My mother's a genius with plants" Ryoga explained, he seemed to be really happy to be home.

"Ryoga!" yelled a brown-haired whirlwind that launched himself at the martial artist and clung to him like a barnacle. Ryoga hugged him back, dark eyes peered at him.

"This is Shinji, my ten year old brother" he explained fondly.

Shinji looked curiously at Kodachi and said "are you Akane Tendo? My brother's going to marry you, you know" he declared.

Kodachi giggled when this caused Ryoga's cheeks to turn pink. "No, I'm Kodachi Kuno, I'm a friend of your brothers" she explained.

Shinji turned to Ryoga "Are you going to marry her instead of Akane?" he asked confused.

"Shinji!" Ryoga said in a startled voice.

"Perhaps someday he will" Kodachi answered, causing Ryoga to blush even deeper.

Taking Ryoga's hand, they went inside to meet his mother, Mitsumi and his father, Isumu. Both of whom were very pleasant and knew their son well, they kept on grabbing his hand to led him to different parts of the house so he wouldn't get lost.

"Where would you like to sleep Kodachi? I don't know whether you'd prefer to sleep with my son or in the guest room" Mitsumi inquired. Both people turned bright red.

"Mom, we're not even married" Ryoga hissed and grabbed a tissue for his nosebleed.

Mitsumi shrugged "I understand that lots of people live together before they marry these days and wanted to appear progressive" she explained.

"The guestroom's just fine for me" stammered Kodachi.

"Suit yourself, your father and I lived together in together until I became pregnant with Ryoga, then we got married" Mitsumi said causally.

"Mom!" Ryoga said in a startled voice. He was mortified at how strange his family was acting. This caused Kodachi to giggle.

He showed her to the guestroom, well it was actually more like she figured out where it was based on the directions supplied by Mitsumi. He promptly shut the door and plopped himself down on the bed. "I'm so sorry, I don't know why everyone's acting so odd" he apologized.

"They probably just find weird that you're bring home a girl for the first time; who isn't the famous Akane Tendo" she said with a giggle when he blushed.

"Sorry about that too" he muttered.

"I would rather I be here instead of Akane" she said, climbing onto his lap.

"Me too" he replied, kissing her.

Kodachi was a little flushed when they reluctantly separated, then she glanced at the closed door, at the bed beneath them and got a nosebleed.

"I'd better leave" Ryoga stammered upon seeing this while he hastily handed her his handkerchief.

Kodachi's face was a red as the blood itself "You do that!" she said with embarrassment

Kuno and Ukyou

Ukyou was in bed still, her fever had broken but she was still feeling slightly unwell.

"Here you go" Kuno said as he brought a tray into the bedroom for her.

She sniffed the air "my that does smell good. What is it?" she asked.

"Chicken Ramen, I ordered it from the Nekohanten and Shampoo dropped it off" he explained.

"You ordered me chicken noodle soup? For a jackass you're awful sweet" she said in appreciation.

"Likewise" he replied with a fond smile.

"I want to thank you for taking care of me these past few days" she said feeling suddenly shy.

"Not a problem, I used to take care of Kodachi when she was younger. My mother always taught me that family should take care of family" Kuno replied.

"I'm not really part of your family" she pointed out.

"Well, not technically, but you are in a sense for now" he pointed out.

"True, so does this mean that we broke Ranma's rules by sleeping together?" she joked.

Kuno blushed "I'm pretty sure that simply sharing a bed doesn't violate anything" he said. "I was wondering why you decided to come to Nerima?" he asked.

"My mother died in childbirth and my father moved us from place to place as a traveling okonomiyaki chef. He died last year, so I came to find my fiancé because he was all that I had left" she said sadly.

"I know how it feels to lose family, my mother died young too. My family used to be so close, we used to travel and do things together all the time. Than my mother died and my father became distance, which is when Kodachi started becoming as she is now. I guess that she's looking for love in her own misguided way, funny how you all seek it from Ranma" he said with a shake of his head.

"There's just something about him" she said.

"I guess that you have to be female to understand the attraction" Kuno said.

"Or gay" she pointed out.

"I'm certainly not that, well I have to go to kendo practice tonight. Will you be okay alone for a few hours or should I have someone come stay with you?" he asked.

"I'll be fine" she assured him. "You know you're really a nice guy"

"For a jackass" he said fondly and gave her a hug, simply enjoying the feeling of her in his arms.

"You got it" she replied hugging him back.

"Gaston sent some food over if you get hungry; its lobster thermidor" he said and smiled when she giggled and pretended to throw her pillow at him.

After practice, Kuno was changing into a fresh uniform when he got approached by one of his teammates, Kenshin. "Hey Kuno, I was wondering what's going on between Kuonji-san and yourself.

"Nothing, we're friends" he replied.

"Yeah, well I heard that you were staying with her. Are you #%#ing her?" he taunted.

Kuno snapped his head around "Ukyou Kuonji is as pure as driven snow and should you imply otherwise then I shall have to call you out" he challenged.

"Does she even like guys?" Kenshin taunted.

"She's engaged to Saotome. What does that tell you?" Kuno asked.

"Well, Ranma does have that curse thing" Kenshin pointed out.

"I don't get what you mean?" Kuno said with dignity.

"You know, one second dark haired guy, splash him with cold water and he becomes the busty redhead that you're so fond of" Kenshin said.

"Wait are you saying that they're both the same person?" Kuno inquired, his brain as frozen in shock at the concept.

"Yes, that is why HIS name is Ranma Saotome and so is HER name" Kenshin said.

"Then that means that....?" Kuno said.

"You've been pursuing a guy for this entire year and the whole school knows it but you" he gloated and smile with satisfaction when Kuno fainted.

Mousse and Shampoo

The rain started falling and Mousse sighed and prepared to become a duck, then he realized that the cold water wasn't touching him, he looked up to see an umbrella being held over his head and noticed Shampoo standing beside him. "Airen always forget umbrella so I brought for you" she explained.

He smiled in gratitude and then looked concerned when she started to tremble when it started thundering and lightening. He picked her up and pressed her into a narrow doorway to shelter them, he held her close as she quaked against him. He knew her weakness was thunder storms. "It's okay Shampoo, just hang onto me" he whispered to her. She looked up at him and then latched onto his lips and started kissing him.

Mousse gasped into her mouth in surprise and then started kissing her back; it was like the passion of the storm had gripped them. They kissed for many long minutes pressed tightly together in their narrow niche. Mousse would have never thought a dingy alleyway could be the height of romance, but it certainly was now. She had her hands wrapped tightly around his neck, while his fingers were entwined in her luxurious hair. While she trembled with fear he trembled with love long denied. Her soft lips fed his starving heart. He tried to put all of his love and desire for her into his kiss. Breathlessly they pulled away; both of their lips were kiss swollen. "Storm over" she observed.

"When did it stop?" he asked, still slightly dazed from the kiss.

"Not sure" she said with a giggle. "Come Airen, we go home" she said and took his hand, Mousse marveled at how soft her hand was as she held his until they got home.

"Shampoo, I hope that I didn't force you to kiss me" he said cautiously.

"Mousse so silly, no can force Amazon woman to kiss. They want to kiss man, they do" she said, smiling at his stunned expression.

Ranma and Akane

Ranma watched from the shadows as Akane sat on a bench and fed the ducks in the pond. She wore the yellow dress and matching hat that he'd bought her and seemed to be really enjoying the antics of the mother duck and her brood of fluffy yellow youngsters. She laughed with happiness as only a young girl at the sweet time of her life between childhood and adulthood can. Ranma swallowed nervously and adjusted the bouquet of yellow roses that he'd bought her. He prayed to the gods that she wouldn't be upset; he couldn't lose her like this! Taking a deep breath he marched forward as if going into battle.

"Akane" he said hesitantly.

"Hello Ranma" Akane said, giving him her heartbreaking smile. "Would you care to join me?" she asked.

"Sure" he said and sat down beside her, she opened her bag of bread and he started feeding the ducks with her. It felt oddly romantic, like they were on a date. It also felt really natural. "Akane?' he started then stopped.

"Yes Ranma?" she asked in a calm tone of voice, like she didn't have a care in the world.

"I have something to tell you" he said cautiously.

"Go ahead" she said.

"I'm Kickinbutt" he said bravely.

She turned eyes on him that danced with amusement. "I know that already" she said.

"W-what?" he asked and blushed when Akane leaned over and gave him his first kiss from her soft lips.

"I've known that from the start, there were too many coincidences for me not to notice" she said to the blushing boy.

"Then why did you let me make a fool of myself?" he asked stunned while she held onto his arm and stroked it.

"I know it was horrible of me, but you opened up to me as Ray in a way that you never could in real life. You showed me your feelings for me and you had no idea how addictive it was" she explained. "Do you hate me?" she asked.

"No, I'm just kind of surprised" he admitted. "Do you hate me?"

"Of course not, you paid attention to me in a way that you never had before. You only ever seemed to be interested in me when either someone else wanted me or I was in danger. All I ever wanted was for you to acknowledge your feelings for me and not to be used just as a trophy in one of your endless challenges.

"I'm sorry about that Akane; I promise that things will be different from now on. I'll never take you for granted again. Is there anything that I can do to make it up to you?" he asked.

"Yes by taking me out on a real date for my birthday" she said.

"You're on, but you'll have to do something too, make it up to me" he said.

"What would that be?" she asked mischievously.

"Another kiss" he said. Ranma captured her lips again and learned the joys of kissing a pretty girl on a bright summer's day. He wasn't ready to tell her that he loved her yet, so he showed her.


	9. Chapter 9

Warning cliffy ahead and implied lemons; merely implied, still PG 13.

Hope everyone's enjoying the story and I wish to say thank you for all the kind reviews that you have been bestowing upon me. Considering I start these with no idea in mind for the ending, it's very generous of you. Hence why sometimes at the end I'm scratching my head and saying "how the heck did that come about?"

******

Kuno and Ukyou

Ukyou napped a bit after Kuno left and woke up feeling one hundred percent better. She got out of bed and took a bath, she could feel the body pains associated with sickness melting away in the hot water and groaned happily. Then got up and washed the sheets from both their beds. She brushed out her hair while she watched them spin round and round. She made up their beds and then went into the kitchen and pulled out the food that Kuno's kindly chef had been bringing over so that his charge wouldn't starve and went to heat it up for Kuno's return. She heard the door open and footsteps on stairs and realized how much she welcomed the sound. It made her realize how much she missed the foibles and habits of someone living with her; her father's death had left a large void in her life that she'd assumed that marriage to Ranma would fill.

"I'm in here Sugar, soups on" she cried in a friendly tone of voice. Despite their rough start, she'd come to care deeply about the kindly kendoist with a heart of gold. She gasped when he walked in, his kendo uniform was torn, his exposed chest bruised and he had a black eye. Taking in his haunted expression, she quickly led to him a chair. "Kuno what happened?" she asked him.

"Did you know that Ranma could turn into a girl?" he asked in a dead sounding tone of voice.

"Yes, everyone knows that" she replied as she gingerly moved his torn shirt aside to search for injuries.

He finally met her eyes, she flinched at the naked pain there "I didn't, I had to have a fellow kendoist mock me to find out. Then I brawled with him like a common school boy; after I fainted like a girl" he explained.

She put her arms around him "hey Ranma makes a cute girl, its no big deal" she soothed.

"No big deal?" he said with a humorless laugh "Here I thought I was the big man on campus, but instead I'm a laughable fool in pursuit of a guy. I'm an idiot, now I finally understand all the subtle jokes made at my expense" he said miserably. "Does this make me gay?" he speculated.

"Of course not Sugar, you like females too much for that" Ukyou assured him. She felt so sorry for him; his self-image had been shattered. "Besides, even Tatewaki Kuno**, **age seventeen**, **Blue Thunder of the Kendo club of Furinkan High School is allowed to make mistakes once in a while" she said in fine imitation of him to cheer him up.

It failed, he swiveled his head towards her and sorrowfully said "I really do sound like that don't I? Akane doesn't like me?" he stated.

"No she doesn't, you set an entire school of perverts on her. I'm not saying that she won't forgive you, but for now she regards you as an enemy and sometimes ally when it comes to martial arts" Ukyou told him honestly.

"So I talk strangely, and try and force myself on females who don't desire my attention? One of whom is a male in real life. Have I just about summed it up what a misguided lothario I am?" he asked.

"You're not, there's nothing wrong with you other than you like pretty girls and don't really know how to go about trying to date them. Your methods are a little extreme, but you have the best of intentions" she said cuddling his closer.

"Tell that to Akane Tendo" he said in an ironic voice, he'd been given a rude awakening and was in shock. "This entire time I've been mocking Kodachi for her ways of trying to trap Ranma, when I'm far worse"

"Look Sugar you just need a hot bath, to get into some clean clothes and then you'll feel much better" she said forced cheerfulness. "I'll even run the bath for you" she volunteered.

Kuno turned his anguished eyes her way and said "I guess so, if you don't mind." While he took a bath, Ukyou looked over his kendo uniform to see if there was someway to repair it.

"Just throw it out, I won't be wearing them anymore" he told her upon his return.

She noticed that he was wearing a red sweatshirt that read Furinkan High School and a pair of black sleep pants "What you do mean?" she said in surprise.

"I'm wearing normal clothes from now on and resigning as President of the Kendo club, my fellow kendoist don't deserve the reputation of having a lunatic for President" he replied with his face tight and unreadable.

"But you love kendo!" protested Ukyou.

"Obscurity is better suited to the mad" he replied. "If I'm lucky from hereon in, I can end my high school career being completely forgotten" he explained.

"You shouldn't give up because of some silly misunderstanding. You're a great martial artist and a decent guy" she chided.

"You don't have to pretend to like me, tomorrow's the second last day that you'll have to spend as my fake wife and then you won't have to see me anymore. You can resume your real life in pursuit of my ex-love" he said sourly.

Ukyou leaned forward and kissed him. His eyes went wide with shock then kissed her back. "If this is going one of our last few nights spent together as husband and wife, then let's be that for real tonight" she suggested.

His eyes went as wide as marbles and he said "you can possibly mean THAT? I thought you were saving yourself for marriage?"

She looked into his blushing face and admitted the truth "after my father died, I went a bit mad. I attended an all boy's school and tried rid myself of anything feminine about me. Well, that's the most feminine thing a girl can have. It only happened once; I requested a male friend to help me and he did. I wasn't thinking about becoming anyone's wife at the time" she said smiling somewhat bitterly. "I've never been with someone I care about and I care about you. Besides, you said that family takes care of family and for now at least, you're my family. Now will you be my husband in truth for tonight at least?" she asked and held out her hand. He hesitated and then took it and allowed her to take him into her bedroom and into her bed. That night Tatewaki Kuno**, **age seventeen**, **Blue Thunderof the Kendo club ofFurinkan High School became a man.

Ryoga and Kodachi

Kodachi smiled while she watching Ryoga, her boyfriend, play football with his younger brother. He looked happy and relaxed to be back home with his family, not a trace of his normally morose self appeared to be present. Shinji was an adorable smaller version of Ryoga, with the same medium set body and was very strong for his age. That's where the similarity ended, personality wise he very outgoing and a naturally flirty child. He'd already proposed to Kodachi ten times within a two day period. Her friends would laugh if they saw the normally trendy Kodachi wearing an old pair of black pants the Ryoga had outgrown, with dirt under her nails from helping his mother in her garden.

Their entire house could fit into Kodachi's formal dining room, yet she felt envious of his loving closely knit family, they reminded her of happier times spent with her own. It reminded her of the way hers would never be again. She sometimes regretted that her brother and herself had drifted apart, but they had little in common other then their strong need to conquer those they loved.

"Catch it" yelled Shinji, startling her out of her contemplation. With forward flip, she caught the ball in mid-air. "That's awesome! Can you teach me how to do that?" he cried.

Ryoga put his hand on his shoulder "Shinji, we're leaving tomorrow. We have to go back to make a report to someone important to Kodachi" he said gently.

"You'll be back right!" Shinji demanded.

"It depends on whether Ryoga invites me back or not" she responded.

"You'd better!" he declared and then when inside.

"It's almost over isn't it?" Ryoga asked.

"You mean the fake marriage challenge that Ranma set out for us?" Kodachi asked.

"I mean us. You're going to return to chasing Ranma around and forget all about me" Ryoga stated.

"I don't know. I won't know until I see Ranma again. It's hard to focus on him when you've been my entire world for weeks. I love him and I think I......" she looked at him in confusion when he covered her mouth.

"Please don't say it if you aren't sure you mean it" he requested.

"I like you a lot" she said honestly. "As for anything else, it's too soon for that"

"I'm fine with that" he said with a smile and drew her onto his lap "come watch the sunset with me, wife?" he requested.

"Of course" she said, settling into his arms and they watched one of the most beautiful sights in the world together. Each sunset bringing them closer to the time they must be divided.

Shampoo and Mousse

Mousse had closed the Nekohanten and went outside for a breath of fresh air. "What Airen doing?" he heard someone say and smiled at Shampoo.

"I'm just enjoying my last few days of being your Airen and wondering if Ranma deserves a medal for suggesting this idea" he said in an ironic tone of voice. "I never thought that I would be thank Ranma for anything"

"You enjoy being with Shampoo?" she asked

He laughed "my only dream in life is marrying you" he pointed out.

"Yes, but that only is fantasy of little boy. How you like reality?" she asked.

"Well, your grasp of Japanese is horrible and you have quite the temper" he teased her.

She pretended to swat him without even half of the force she had in the past "Well, you look like geek with thick glasses" she replied, "I prefer your pretty eyes" she said taking off his glasses and kissing him. He kissed her softly back. "So Shampoo not perfect like used to think?" she asked.

"Hell no, you may be able to cook, but you give Akane run for her money when it comes to temper" he said affectionately.

She sagged at her rival's name "You know that Shampoo must marry Ranma? No getting around law" she said, more annoyed by this idea then she thought she would ever be.

"I know, you don't think I can beat you or him. I just wanted to thank you for allowing me this time, I'll pack my bags and go home if you want" he offered.

"No leave Airen, will you take walk with Shampoo?" she asked.

"As long as you want me to" he replied.

Akane and Ranma

It was Akane's seventeenth birthday and Ranma was taking her on a date.

"About time you man up Ranma my boy" chided Genma.

He was surprised when his tuxedo clad son grabbed the collar of his gi "you will not attempt to interfere with this date in anyway got it!" Ranma snarled. "Now send in Nabiki" he ordered him.

"You wanted to see me Ranma?" she asked.

"Yes, I am going to warn you that should you try to disclose the location of our date to our other suitor, you'll not find them very receptive. They've been assigned to other tasks and that does include your best customer, Kuno Baby" he threatened.

She looked offended "do you actually think so little of me?" she asked. He answered her with a glare. "Okay but you can't blame a girl for wanting to make so cash. Besides, Kuno's acting a little strange. I tried to sell him a picture of girl-type you in a bikini and what he told me to do with it isn't worth repeating" she said with a frown.

"Whatever, this day's about Akane, not about your pocketbook" he snapped.

"Okay, I promise" she said.

Ranma adjusted his tie and reached into his pocket to make sure that the ring was there. It was his mother's engagement ring; she'd insisted that he take it when he told her of his plans. He'd buy Akane her own one later on, so this ring was strictly symbolic. It was still pretty and pleasing; it was small princess cut diamond in a rose gold setting. He hoped that she would like it and understand that he'd made his choice. No more playing the fiancées off each other, no more taking up every challenge, no more treating her like a trophy to be won or insulting her. She was his choice and tonight he would prove that to her. The only game he was playing tonight was to win her heart.

He'd originally planned to take her to a mountain top with a picnic lunch and propose there, as it would have been all that he could afford to do.

However, an anonymous person had sent him a hotel package that included his tux rental, two rooms for the night and dinner at the nicest place in town. Ranma had thanked everyone that he could think of (outside of the suitors) and accepted his benefactor's kind generosity.

He brushed an invisible hair off his jacket and went to meet Akane, his jaw dropped to find her wearing a demure, yet sexy black dress. It was plain and her only adornments were the blue highlights in her hair and her soft brown eyes. "You look beautiful Red" he whispered.

"You look great too Ray" she said, Ranma smiled and carried their overnight bags to the waiting taxi. Akane gasped when they pulled up to the fanciest hotel in town. "Ranma how can you afford all this?" she asked in wonderment.

"I got a little help from a friend" he replied and took her arm to lead her inside. Akane turned red when they were shown to one luxuriously appointed room and then was relieved when they were shown to the one that Ranma would be sleeping in.

"You had me going there for a second" she said with a nervous laugh.

"I know you better then that; you're waiting for your wedding night" Ranma said shrewdly, causing Akane to blush. "So am I" he whispered, causing her to blush even deeper.

They were escorted into a private room that featured lots of plants a small fountain situated close to their table. Everything was done in tones of burgundy with cream coloured walls with recessed lighting. Soft music played on hidden speakers, the over all ambience was rich and elegant, but not stuffy. Akane allowed the waiter to push in her chair.

"Seriously did you win the lottery or something?" she whispered.

"Relax, I can afford this" he assured her.

"If you say so?" she said in amusement. "I certainly hope you're not planning dine and dash because I'm wearing high heels"

"Of course not" he assured her.

Ranma was so nervous about the fact that he was going go ask Akane to marry him that he barely noticed the well presented food that he'd eaten. Not even when Akane kept pressing him to sample each one of her dishes. He mainly remembered the soft look in her eyes when he held out his own fork to be sampled, how her tiny, sharp teeth would nip each morsel from it and how she would close her eyes and say "ummmm" after each bite.

Finally with a signal to the waiter, he faced the biggest challenge of his life. Swallowing nervously, he waited until the violinist was led in and started playing one of her favourite songs "Unchained Melody" Akane gasped in surprise when Ranma got down on one knee and held the ring up to her.

"Akane Tendo, you've accused me of not caring for you and hating being forced into a marriage with you. That's not true, I love you. On the day of your seventeenth birthday as you head towards womanhood, I want you to know that I want to be with you now, forever and always. Will you do me the honour of becoming my wife?"

Akane's eyes filled with tears and she sniffled a bit, but didn't say anything.

"Akane, will you?" Ranma prompted gently.

Suddenly she started to laugh and said "no," but not in a voice of rejection, but of gentle amusement.


	10. Chapter 10

I just wanted to respond to one of the reviews I got, actually pocket book is a real word, and it's just rather dated like me lol. Its definition can be found online, it's pretty much a wallet, billfold, purse or handbag. Also Ukyou did get a mention in the chat room, she was Spatulagirl. As for Gosunkugi Hikaru, I'm simply not interested in the character. He plays a large role in one of my favourite stories on adultfanfiction (dot) net, which I really can't put on here due to its graphic nature. Btw, unless Akane, Ranma and Kuno were all born in the same month, she could turn seventeen before Kuno hits eighteen.

However that being said, I hope that no one minds if I plug a story by one of my favourite people that I met on adultfanfiction (dot) net. It's called Ranma's War and would be rated about a K+ if it was on ff. It's a wonderful X-Men/Ranma crossover which seamlessly blends together. The person who wrote it is a gear head whose passion is motorcycles, so he used his own knowledge of this to create Ranma as a motorcycle enthusiast. There are also some elements of other animes. Please note, this isn't me, I write under imsadistic on there. I just feel that this story isn't getting the attention it deserves and he won't put it on ff. So you who ARE (I am not suggesting anyone break the law here) over the age of 18, you just need to sign on electronically. Under the members tools tab, go to search. Type or paste animedevildog in the keywords under authors and then click on his name and choose Ranma's War. It's well worth the read.

Ukyou and Kuno

Kuno woke up the next day feeling oddly warm and contented, he opened his eyes and beheld Ukyou's sleeping form cradled against his own and blushed when he remembered what had happened the night before. Feeling a sense of panic, with the stealth of a ninja he carefully extracted himself from her warm embrace and pulled on the clothes that he'd discarded the night before. He froze when she frowned in her sleep and seemed to search for him, he held his breath positive she would awake, he silently sighed with relief when she turned over and hugged her pillow instead.

Soundlessly he padded to the room that he'd been staying in and sat on the bed. He pondered what to do about the situation. 'Was he supposed to ask for her hand in marriage now?' he wondered and than decided that she was a modern woman and that was far too eighteenth century for her. 'Did she expect him to become her boyfriend?' no she wanted Ranma. The more he thought about it, the more confused he became. It was not like he had faced this problem before.

He was deeply embarrassed that he'd allowed her to see him like that. He was a passionate person by nature, but him being depressed wasn't something that anyone had ever seen outside of his family. Then he wondered why she'd wanted to do THAT with him when he was like that. Did seeing a guy emotionally vulnerable turn her on? 'No, it was that she pitied him' he realized with a blush. Tatewaki Kuno's first time was a mercy #%# and that angered him.

He had always thought that his first time would either with Akane or the Pig-Ranma, his brain reminded him, he quashed that thought before he got ill.

Then he thought back on the experience, it had felt a tad awkward, but oddly felt natural with her. She had been so tender with him. Then he thought back on how he had acted and blushed so deep that he was almost purple, he'd probably called her every pet name in the book and endless told her how much he cared about her. She would realize that it was all pillow talk born of his confused emotions right? Then he went cold when he realized that no protection was used, she'd said that none was necessary as she was 'close to her time'. He pondered what that meant and then slapped his head at his foolishness, realizing that that was what the tampons were for.

He didn't know what to do, he felt, trapped; she wouldn't want a pathetic creature like himself and after the epiphany of the night before he wasn't ready to pursue a lost cause again. No his best course of action was to leave; he realized, he quickly dressed and started packing.

Ukyou woke up and frowned when she couldn't find Tatewaki. She never opened the restaurant on Sundays and was planning to suggest that they spend the day together. She smelled the pillow beside hers and smiled that it held his clean, musky scent. The night before had been wonderful to her; there was no pain this time and he had been so gentle and loving. Wondering where he was, she got out of bed and slipped into a short nightgown to go find him. "Hey Kuno" she said when she found him standing in the hallway. Then she noticed his luggage "are you going somewhere?" she asked him in confusion.

He startled and looked guilty. "I got a phone call, there's a family emergency going on back at the mansion" he explained in a jumpy voice.

"Has something happened to Kodachi? Should I go with you?" Ukyou asked with concern.

He rubbed the back on his head nervously "Its, its family business. I've got to go. I'll see you at the challenge report tomorrow morning" he said, gave her a chaste kiss on the cheek and darted out. He shook his head to clear image in it; in her short, almost girlish nightgown Ukyou had looked like a sleepy angel. He laughed ironically at the folly of his situation, had he received a mere kiss from sweet Akane Tendo he would've shouted it from the rooftops. Yet on the subject of making love to Ukyou Kuonji, he would be as silent as the grave.

Ukyou could feel tears of sadness and humiliation running down her cheeks, she felt like she'd been used by someone who she thought liked her at least.

Ranma and Akane

"What do you mean no?" Ranma demanded.

"Ranma, I'm only seventeen and I've never wanted to be a fiancée to anyone. I just want to be your girlfriend first and then worry about marriage later on, I'm not ready for that step yet" she explained.

Ranma's heart flooded with relief "so you would be content with just being my girlfriend?" he asked.

"Of course, I love you too Ranma. I would like nothing more then to be your girlfriend. Your only one" she added shrewdly. "Are you willing to commit to me?"

"I do" he said.

"Good, however there can be no other girls involved and I mean it! No other girlfriends, no fiancées, not even so much as a compelling cross dresser" she ordered sharply.

"Hey how about you, you willing to give up on other guys?" he asked.

Akane rolled her eyes "Who Ryoga and Kuno? Like I ever wanted them!" she said, blowing a raspberry.

"So we agree to be your averagely boring monogamous couple?" he asked.

"Yes, as average as life around you can get" Akane said with a laugh.

"I love you Akane" Ranma said.

"I love you Ranma" she replied and took his hand. "So what're you going to do with the ring?" she asked.

"Keep on asking you until you say yes" he replied. "You know how I can never resist a challenge" he said with a wicked grin.

"How are we going to handle our other suitors?" Akane asked.

"I already took care of that" Ranma replied and explained what he did.

Akane cocked her head and than laughed "no wonder it's been so quiet. You think it's going to work?" she asked.

"I can only hope so. Either way, they'll have to accept that we're together and there's nothing that they can to about it" Ranma said in a commanding tone of voice.

Akane thought that it was sexy that he was being so forceful and asked "I brought my bathing suit, would you like to join me in the hot tub in my room?"

Ranma turned bright and could only nod and walked her to her room, then went to change himself. Upon his return, his eyes went wide when she slipped out of her robe to reveal a black bikini. She lowered herself into the water beside him and cuddled close. His lips met hers, they kissed until they were breathless, their bodies pressed tightly together in the warm bubbly water. Ranma laughed when Akane got a nosebleed. "Red, I think that the sooner that our wedding night comes, the better" he observed while she blushed.

The Challenge Report

Ranma and Akane presided over the dojo, neither one of them had revealed their new relationship to anyone yet. Their eyes sweep over the assigned couples and approved that both Shampoo and Mousse and Kodachi and Ryoga were holding hands. These were the people that they were the most worried about.

"So gentlemen, please present your reports and than the ladies may say a few words" Ranma ordered.

Ranma noted that although Kuno was sitting beside Ukyou, they seemed to be trying to make sure that they didn't touch each other. Everything in their postures seemed to shriek 'let's get it over with' Ranma wondered what had happened to them. He'd have bet money he didn't have, that the crazy kendoist would fall hard for the cute Ukyou and that she would start to care about him to turn. They both wore their almost palpable loneliness like a cloak around them and Ranma thought that they would respond to that.

Kuno stood up "Ukyou's a wonderful woman who despite being busy would make a wonderful wife. The man lucky enough to get her would have to understand that she's a busy, working woman who loves her job. He wouldn't get all of her attention all the time as result, but the time he did get would be well worth it" he said and sat down.

Ukyou stood up "no comment" she said sat down.

Mousse stood up "Shampoo would make a wonderful wife as well, her husband would never lack for affection or attention. She has a temper, that's true, but underneath it, she has a heart of gold and never fails to show it to those in need. You couldn't fail by choosing her as your wife, she will make a great one and wonderful mother to your children" he said and sat down.

Shampoo stood up "I know that people going to think Shampoo crazy as object of contest hot date with Ranma, but Shampoo loves Mousse" she said and smiled tenderly at his look of astonishment. "These two weeks, he like before when we children, good tender friends. He sweet and loving, not pushy. "So Shampoo would like date with Mousse instead of Ranma. Is okay?" she asked.

Ranma stood up "I did say that the date was to be with the man of your dreams. Not a problem. But what about the law?" he asked.

"We not sure what to do" Shampoo said miserably.

Ranma walked up to Mousse and said "stand up" the confused boy did "hit me" he ordered him.

"I don't want to" Mousse replied.

"Just do it!" Ranma ordered.

Mousse reluctantly tapped Ranma on his chest with a blow that wouldn't hurt a baby. Ranma fell to the floor with a dramatic cry, writhed at bit and then lay still for a few seconds, then stood up "You all saw it, he defeated me. Meaning that with Shampoo not against marrying Mousse and him defeating me, she just has to pretend to be defeated by him and nothing will bar their marriage. Tell that to the old bat!" Ranma said smugly.

"Ranma genius!" Shampoo cried happily and hugged Mousse.

"I'm willing to serve as witness" Ukyou volunteered.

"Me too" Ryoga said.

"And the Kuno family will pay for Mousse's laser eye surgery as a wedding gift" Kuno volunteered.

"But that's expensive!" Mousse protested.

"Not for me" Kuno said in amusement. Which Ukyou thought was sweet of him to offer.

"Mousse not be weak if eyes better" Shampoo pointed out.

"So what're you planning to do?" Ranma asked Shampoo.

"Tell great-grandmother that we want get married. Go home for wedding, come back here and run restaurant while great-grandmother return to village. Tokyo Chinese community crazy for Amazon Ramen" she explained.

"Good luck to you Mousse" Ranma said holding out his hand, the Chinese boy took it.

"And to you Ranma" Mousse replied shaking the hand of his former enemy and new friend.

"Now back to business: what's your report like Ryoga?" asked Ranma

Ryoga stood up "Kodachi's a wonderfully warmhearted woman who's great with children, has a great sense of humour and is really fun to be with. She would make a wonderful wife and mother" he declared and sat down.

Kuno startled in surprise to hear his sister described this way.

Kodachi stood up and said "Ranma dear, it is good to see my fiancé again. However, when I compare you to Ryoga, who has become so very dear to me, I'm afraid that I must decline our date in favour of going on it with him. He's the man of my dreams. Like Shampoo implied; I hope that there's no hard feelings"

"Not a problem, congratulations to you two. Do I hear wedding bells in the future?" Ranma asked facetiously, causing both people to blush.

"Not without her brother's approval" added Kuno

"Very well, there's only one couple that didn't make it. Before I declare Ukyou as the winner of the date, Akane and I have something to tell you. Akane Tendo has agreed to be my girlfriend and we're in a committed relationship. I'm still willing to take you on a date Ukyou, as I promised I would, but this is the final time" Ranma declared.

"Girlfriend, not fiancée?" questioned Shampoo.

"I asked her to marry me but she said that she was too young to consider that, so she agreed to be my girlfriend instead. I think she's right, there'll be plenty of time to worry about marriage when we're old and gray" he said smiling affectionately at Akane, who hit him in the bicep.

Ukyou watched the two of them and realized that it was too late, Ranma's heart was already taken and not by her. Then she thought about their past behaviour, she'd always interpreted it as hatred for each other and saw past the obvious for the first time. She started remembering the words of comfort that had passed between them, the tender looks shared and the gentle support that they'd showed each other and realized that Ranma was never Ukyou's to begin with. She'd never been in competition with Akane in the first place; Ranma had been hers the second they'd met.

She stood up "its okay, I really don't care to date Akane's boyfriend. That mallet looks painful" she said and got a few laughs.

Akane took Ranma's hand and said "thank you Ukyou"

She stood up "no problem sugar, just make sure that you take care of him or I'll be back" she warned.

Kuno said "Akane and Ranma, I just want you to know that I won't bother either of you again. Not Akane or the other side of Ranma"

Ranma said "ah, you finally found out the true identity of your pigtailed goddess I take it?"

"Yes I found out in a painful way. I hope that you can both find it in your hearts to forgive me someday" he requested humbly.

Ranma nodded at Akane and she nodded back "we already forgive you; just stop grabbing my breasts" Ranma said and the rest laughed.

"I've got to go" said Ukyou. She stalked away mad when Kuno started following her. "Go away" she ordered him.

"Look, I just want to talk to you about the other night" Kuno whispered to her, afraid to be overheard.

"There's nothing to discuss, you made it quite clear that the great Tatewaki Kuno doesn't like cross dressing girls. Consider it a mistake on both of our parts and stay the heck away from me" she retorted in a low tone of voice. "Goodbye Jackass" she said and hurried away.

"Fine" Kuno said, he spun around and left in the other direction.

Kodachi happened to overhear their exchange as she and Ryoga were exiting the dojo while this was going on. She sighed and decided to find out what her big brother had done THIS time.


	11. Chapter 11

Fuming, Kuno practically ripped open the door of his room and then slammed it shut as much as you can a sliding shoji door, which was just enough to alert the staff that the heir to the Kuno family fortune was 'in a mood' and to tread lightly around him.

Practically tearing his kendo uniform from himself, he cursed that vile woman who had publically snubbed him. Still muttering oaths, he took a shower as hot as he could stand it in an attempt to wash any trace of her from his skin; he scrubbed himself until he was as red as a boiled lobster. Yet this did nothing to calm his agitation.

He pulled on some 'normal clothes' as she had termed anything other then his kendo uniform. They were rather worn and he would never dare wear them outside of his house; they were just for comfort and warmth, not style. Then he thought about his situation and wondered why he'd been so hurt when she'd refused to talk to him. She was nothing to him, less then nothing, merely a person foisted on him by a stupid challenge.

Ukyou Kuonji, he'd really taken any particular notice of her. He'd hated her at first when he was forced to live in that tiny box she called an apartment. He'd thought her clothes distasteful and her rude and arrogant. First there was her male uniform and bound breasts, rendering practically her asexual and then the rather revealing outfit that she donned to work in; both distasteful to him in different ways.

Then he got to know her and learned things about her outside of school. He'd known that she worked out in the gym almost everyday after school and set a punishing regime for herself that almost rivaled his own. What he hadn't known was that after that she went home, ate a quick dinner and opened her restaurant. She would cook at a breakneck pace for the rest of the evening until she closed the restaurant at ten pm on the nose, at which point she would clean up and ready the restaurant for the next day. Finally she would crack the books and do her homework to maintain an almost perfect grade point average and finally slip into bed at midnight, only to repeat it all the next day. It was awe inspiring and slightly surreal at the same time.

Kuno was surprised when she'd unintentionally revealed a softer side to him. He noticed that she refused payment from her poorer customers and that she always put down bowls of catfood at her backdoor to feed the neighbour strays who ended up there, attracted by the smell of food. He noticed that when she saw a young couple obviously in love or a young family, she got a wistful smile on her face. Finally he noticed that she was really cute, she wasn't a devastating beauty, but she also wasn't the somewhat plain boy-girl he'd thought her to be. His resistance to her charms had melted entirely when she was unwell, reminding him of Kodachi needing him when she was younger. He remembered waking up in the mornings to find a smaller her cuddled against him like a monkey, her dark hair sprawled across his pillow and her sweet child's breath on his cheek. He hadn't hesitated acting like, he imagined now, a real husband would. He was surprised how tiny Ukyou was under her gruff exterior, her petit too-warm body curled against his wearing just that white-stuff nightgown. He started to care for her. Was it possible she liked him too?

Then there was the fatal night that had divided them; to him it had seemed.....magical. He tried to remember the last time a girl had willingly given him a hug; he couldn't. Just stroked his hand? No again. Yet she had offered him all of those things and much more that night. Was it simply pity as he thought or did she care about him? If that was the case, than of course she was mad about how he bolted.

Frustrated, he threw a pillow towards the door wanting to break the screen, only to have Kodachi catch it.

"What are you doing in my room?" he demanded.

She calmly sat down beside him and munched an apple "you seem upset and I want to know why Tatewaki" she said.

He was almost shocked to hear her call him by his first name "What, no facetious sounding 'brother dear'?" he asked.

She turned her eyes towards him "I wish to have a serious discussion; mocking you would achieve nothing but hostility" she explained "Now I would like to know the cause of your argument with Ms. Kuonji back there" she stated.

Kuno blushed "I'm not at liberty to discuss that with anyone, let alone my younger sister" he replied.

Kodachi noticed the blush and put two and two together "I take it that perhaps the sleeping arrangement that Ranma forbade occurred? Did you take advantage of a sweet, naïve young girl and then spurn her?" she asked cruelly.

"What! I would never do that to a woman; it was hardly her first time" he said indignantly and then clapped his hand over his mouth, having imparted too much information

"But it was yours?" she observed. Kodachi was using all her discipline as a martial artist to appear as cool as possible; underneath it all, the untouched girl was blushing and was just as uncomfortable as her bother.

"I can't discuss this with my little sister!" he snapped.

"How so? I'm waiting for marriage myself as I don't believe in causal love. But if you do, I'm not judging" she said with a nonchalant shrug.

Kuno closed his eyes and pretended not to hear her; this was a nightmare! "This-is-not-something-I-want-to-talk-about" he said, emphasizing each word.

"It is that I'm your sister or that I'm a woman? So was it the other way around, did she say that you were no good, inadequate or something like that? Did she kick you out of bed? What happened?" she asked.

"Kodachi!" Kuno said in a strangled voice "It's none of your business!" he cried, wanting to tear his hair out.

"Look I know that we haven't been close for years, but I do care about you and what to know why you're hurting. A woman's perspective might help" she said incitingly.

He looked at her warily "you won't tell anyone?"

She crossed her heart "I wouldn't gossip about my brother's love life, that's too revolting. Would you gossip about mine?" she asked.

"Gods no" he said sharply. Then his shoulders sagged "we kind of connected. Then I received some...disturbing new that depressed me" he explained.

"Then you went into that weird state where you think you're the scum of the earth?" Kodachi said, remembering those ones well.

He nodded in confirmation "she tried to console me and then ended up offering me an......alternative healing method, which worked" he explained.

"Tatewaki, you don't have to sugar coat it for me, just say that you #%#ed" she said impatiently.

He glared at her for the harshness of her language "it was more then that, we made love, I felt a deeper connection with her then anyone else in my entire life. It was beyond the physical, it was more emotional; I felt safe I guess" he said. "Then the next day I got scared of my feelings for her and ran like a chicken"

Kodachi regarded him "so after all those years of chasing girls that don't want you, you ran away from the one who does?" she said, summing it up for him.

"Yes" he replied, lost in thought.

"Do you not like her, is she a not good enough for you, not pretty enough?" she asked.

"I do like her" he replied.

"But you don't love her?" Kodachi asked.

"No, but I probably would given time" he said, seeing it clearly for the first time.

"And that is why you ran. You like controlling every element of your life and that includes who you falls in love with. You chose two candidates who both fit your ideal and didn't even consider other girls. Then a woman that you never figured on, slipped under your radar and you panicked" she explained.

"Am I really so much of a control freak?" he asked.

"Yes you are. But you can change, god knows I did. However, there's a girl who you should go apologize to. I would kill a man who bolted like you did"

"So you're positive that you're going to marry Ryoga? He's your first boyfriend after all" he pointed out.

"Who knows? Either one day I'll tell my children "I had a few boyfriends and then I met your father" or I'll say "I met your father when I was sixteen" Either way, I'm not going to try to rush into marriage anymore, Akane's right about waiting" she said with a shrug.

"I think so too" he agreed.

Kodachi and Ryoga

"Well, what's going on?" Ryoga asked with concern.

"They just have some things to work out" she said, unwilling to divulge so private a conversation even to her beloved.

"Have you thought some more about my offer?" Ryoga asked.

"Yes, I'm not saying no, but I think that we should wait a bit. It's only been two weeks after all" she said.

"So you don't want to marry me?" he asked, his face falling.

"Yes I do, after we graduate college" she explained.

"We? But I'm not even in school!" Ryoga protested

"I'll agree to date you exclusively if you go back to school" she said persuasively. "You can live in our guesthouse; I've already cleared it with my brother. He'd let you live the house, but he was worried about my reputation if he did and we'll visit your family a lot" she said.

"So you're going to arrange the rest of my life for me?" he asked with a fond smile.

"Someone has to help you find your way" she demurred.

Ukyou and Kuno

He decided to waste no time and went to Ukyou's restaurant. Ukyou was surprised to see Kuno show up wearing worn jean with holes in the knees and a shabby black t-shirt. "We don't serve your sort here!" she snapped.

He raised an eyebrow at her "schoolmates?" he asked her.

"No jackasses" she replied.

"Well I'm not leaving until you talk to me" he snarled.

"Don't make me call the police!" she threatened.

"And what you're going to tell them, that I'm attempting to be a patron of your establishment?" he asked.

"Just leave, I don't want you here!" she ordered.

"Why?" he asked, crossing his arms and refusing to move.

Something inside Ukyou snapped "Why? You #%#ing ask why? You #%#ed me and then you #%#ing ran away like the #%#ing miserable coward you are! Go #%# yourself!" she screamed and then blushed when her restaurant went dead silent except for some gossipy sounding whispers. Ukyou turned first flame red and then dead white, facing the crowd she said "I'm terribly sorry, my friend and I were rehearsing lines for a play that he wrote" she lied.

"Sounds like an off, off, off Broadway production" hissed a young mother at a nearby table, her hands were clamped over her child's ears.

Cool as a cucumber, Kuno gallantly said "I'm terribly sorry about our display, please allow me to cover your meals this evening"

"Guess that one's playing a Rockefeller?" piped in another voice.

"Those peasants, I'm a Kuno" he declared "Now, I need to talk to your lovely chef. If you can complete your orders and add whatever else you want to them, I would appreciate if you would get your meals to go"

"Why you jackass! How can you order my customers to leave!" she snarled, and then blushed bright red when he kissed her in front of everyone, which had the desired effect of shutting her up.

"Its okay miss, we understand about young love" assured the young mother with a twinkle in her eye. Ukyou's jaw dropped and she struggled to think of something clean to say. One by one, her customer's orders were dropped off at their table and they filed out with a polite nod to Kuno. When the last one was gone, she seized her spatula and charged at him.

"You think that you have a say in how I run my business? Prepare to die you vile worm!" she cried as she leapt at him. He parried with his bokken, which appeared out of nowhere as usual.

"Worm? Now that's insulting" he said.

"Pig" she spat.

"No that's Ryoga, I don't have a water curse" he remarked and parried again.

"I'm going to tear you limb from limb" she cried.

"That's not what you wanted to do with them the last time" he replied. Blocking her spatula again and knocking it back.

She sprang back "I hate you!" she cried and then realized that her arms were shaking.

She gasped in outrage when he plucked it from her and calmly said "no you don't hate me anymore than I hate you"

"You ran" she said miserably. "I didn't even merit a proper goodbye kiss"

"I left for two reasons, the first being that I was embarrassed for being so pathetic that you made love to me out of pity and that you weren't the girl I pictured it being with. I know that that's not an excuse, but it's the best that I can offer" he said.

She exploded "you come in with this 'I'm just like you' crap and spouting nonsense about us being family and then you bolt the second we make love! You are pathetic. No wonder you don't have a girlfriend. You walk around like you're all high and mighty when you're a....." the rest was silenced by his kiss.

"Yes I am all of that, but you adore me" he said with a cocksure grin.

"Adore you? Are you insane? How could you possibly think that!" she exploded.

"I know so because you only ever got this passionate about Ranma, other then that you're as cool as a cucumber" he said logically. "Can you deny it?"

"I-I" she said with her face flaming, unable to say no. She gasped when he picked her up and swung her around.

"See you do adore me and you're going to be my girlfriend!" he declared.

"Hey I never agreed to that!" she protested. "You haven't even asked me!" she said laughing.

"Sorry, would you be my girlfriend?" Kuno asked, the warm light in brown his eyes made her happy.

"I don't love you" she admitted.

"Hey adoring me is a good start, I feel the same way. Please say yes" he almost pleaded.

"Yes, but won't your friends bug you about my cross dressing?" she asked.

"If they try, I'll announce that the new kendo uniform is a flowery dress and high heels. That'll shut them up" Kuno replied.

"You're bad" she said affectionately.

"I'll get better with age, you'll see. Now how about I take my boyfriend out to see a movie?" he teased.

"You're on, let me go put on my jockstrap and get your bill ready" she teased back.

Mousse and Shampoo

She was massaging his shoulders "now remember whatever she say, you chosen Airen. Show no weakness, must be strong"

"Shampoo I know how to talk to Cologne" Mousse protested.

"No you know how smart mouth her and get hit in head. You must talk like tough fiancé, no take no for answer" she insisted.

"It doesn't matter whether she gives us her blessing or not" Mousse pointed out.

"I future leader, you want deny our daughter same?" Shampoo said, causing Mousse to think about their wedding night and nosebleed.

"No think dirty thoughts now" she cautioned and managed to slip him some napkins just in time to save his white robe.

"Shampoo you wished to see me?" asked Cologne.

Mousse pushed up his glasses "yes, I defeated Ranma and Shampoo has agreed to marry me. We would like your blessing"

"Yes I had those other oafs drop in to tell me about this supposed fight that you had with Ranma. I'm sorry, but I can't give you my blessing, you are simply not good enough for my great-granddaughter" she said and prepared to pogo away.

"Why you old bat!" he cried and went to grab her. She swung her club and was surprised when Shampoo stopped it.

"You say he not good enough? Why, his family in good standing and he known as good strong warrior for male? Why you no approve?" she challenged her. "You tell me thirteen years no good, is weak. Why?" she yelled at her.

"Shampoo, you would dare raise your voice to your elder! You will marry Ranma, not the duck boy!" she ordered

"No Ranma marry Akane Tendo. I marry man I love and you not stop us" Shampoo shouted.

"You want to know why I don't like him? He's as blind as a bat, he charges around here like a bull in a china shop, running into everything and talking to inanimate objects. He's an embarrassment and you expect me to call him son-in-law!" she shouted back.

"Yes I do, his eyes not his fault. He get them fixed before wedding, tall kendo weirdo pay. You either accept that we get married and give blessing, or we just elope" she threatened. "Then you never meet great-great-grandchildren and we never tell them about you or about tribe. They grow up Japanese" Shampoo declared.

Cologne's own eyes goggled now, she turned to Mousse "you're getting your eyes fixed?" she asked.

"Yes" he said, a challenge in his voice.

"Welcome to the family son-in-law" she said shaking his hand.

"You've got to be kidding me; I changed myself in everyway I could think of to make myself worthy of her in your eyes. I learned martial arts. I trained hard and worked out everyday. I crammed myself with food to try and bulk up my muscles and even drank special powders. I attacked my domestic duties just as hard and I worked in this rattrap for free for a year, and none of that mattered! All I had to do was get my eyes fixed!" he raved at her.

Shampoo giggled "Amazons Warriors funny creatures no. Wo ai ni Mu Tzu, we get married yes?" she said, hugging him from behind.

He gave her a sheepish smile and said "Yes, Wo ai ni Xian Pu"

Ranma and Akane

"Will you marry me Red?" Ranma asked from his bended knee position on the floor in front of her.

Akane giggled and rinsed another dish that she was washing. She looked at the now very familiar ring and said "Not yet; that makes it six times today. Is that ring superglued to your hand? When are you going to give up?" she asked.

"When you say yes" he said, kissing her and then laughed himself when she flicked dishwater at him.


	12. Chapter 12

Well folks this is the final chapter, thank you for taking this roam with me through Ranmaverse. This story was actually a challenge to myself to see if I could write a PG 13 all the way through, without inserting a lemon; Sid loves writing lemons. I actually made it! Well there was an implied lemon, but not like how I normally write them. Hope you enjoyed reading this old broad's story and that you all trying writing yourself in the future (those that don't). Everyone has a story to tell and I would love to read yours, send me a pm if you do ;)

This is set one year in the future

******

"Come on Airen, we be late for Akane and Ranma's engagement party" Shampoo called up the stairs. When her husband walked sedately down the stairs, she grabbed him and kissed him deeply.

"What was that for?" Mousse asked in amusement.

"You not running downstairs after Shampoo and crashing into wall anymore" she said, stroking his cheek.

"You don't have to keep on rewarding me for that, I can see perfectly fine now. If you keep that up; we're going to be late for sure" Mousse said raising an eyebrow suggestively at her.

"You wait until after party!" she admonished. "I like new improved Mousse, sexy" she commented.

"I like me too" he replied giving her a slightly feral smile.

The Engagement Party

It was held at the Tendo residence and the place had been beautifully decorated for the party. The lighting was dim and the decorations both colourful, yet tasteful and Kasumi had really outdone herself with the buffet spread.

It was as usual, all of the males had bonded together one on side, leaving the females to herd similarly.

The Girls Section

"Congratulations on getting your real estate license Shampoo" Akane commented. "But how do you manage to point out details of houses with your.....thick accent" Akane said, pretty sure that pointing out her broken Japanese wouldn't be polite.

"Thank you Akane, Shampoo doesn't know. Men seem find Shampoo's way of talking cute and want to buy house" she explained. "It good have second career with Mousse planning become architect" she said. "Thank you for tutoring him Akane" she said.

"You're welcome; it's great how quickly he caught on to my instructions. He really is as geeky as he looks" Akane commented.

They all glanced at the tall Amazon male. Wearing a black suit that displayed his drool worthy body to an advantage and his long, ink black hair highlighting his green eyes and angelic features, he looked good enough to eat.

Ukyou commented "He doesn't look so geeky anymore, I think studly better describes him now" All of the girls continued to contemplate him, until Mousse looked at them questioningly and they all looked away.

Shampoo laughed "stop drooling over Shampoo's Airen. You could have got him when he single, but no wanted to. Now is Shampoo's stud" she proclaimed.

"Hey I'm pretty happy with mine" Kodachi said.

"Me too sugar" Ukyou said.

Kodachi looked at her with a pained expression "I really don't want to think about my brother that way" she said.

"I like thinking of him that way" Ukyou said triumphantly.

"Shampoo, I love your kimono" Akane said. She was wearing a fuchsia kimono that slit up one side.

"I love Akane's dress too" Shampoo said. She was wearing a deep red cocktail dress that looked amazing with her dark hair and soft brown eyes. "But then again, Shampoo always envy Akane's petit figure. Shampoo so tall and curvy" she admitted, frowning distastefully at her full hips.

"Are you kidding? I've always resented you for being so beautiful!" Akane cried.

"Oh Shampoo look silly, all big hips and weird colour hair" she protested. "Envy all you dark haired Japanese beauties"

"Really? I envied you also!" Ukyou exclaimed.

"Why, I also envy you with slim hips, long straight hair and fiery temper. You perfect girl next door beautiful' Shampoo said. "Also envy Kodachi with perfect figure and face, should be model"

"I feel the same" giggled Akane.

"Me too" laughed Ukyou. Kodachi just struck a pose and cracked them all up again, then said. "I think that it's safe to say, that we were the hottest pack of fiancées that any guy could've hoped to have. However, I'm glad that we're all friends now and wish Akane and Ranma the best. Akane I've always envied your hot tomboy looks and your effect on Ranma, but no more. The best girl won, congratulations" she said and raised her glass; they all toasted and then hugged.

Ukyou grinned at her "so engaged at eighteen huh? I thought you wanted to wait a while before getting married?"

Akane rolled her eyes "he wore me down with his constantly proposing to me, that and he provided me with a sample of what our wedding night would be like. After that I couldn't wait anymore" she explained. "I'm not concerned about being a married college student. While I'm there, Ranma will be getting his certification as a gym teacher, as a fall back career and we can still live together. We're going to get married anyway, why wait?" she said with a shrug.

"I'll drink to that, then I want to drink to our guys" Kodachi said, they all toasted and then stared at them with expressions on their faces akin to hungry sharks.

"So what's going to happen when Ryoga attends the Leflore School of Cooking?" Akane asked. At Gaston's suggestion, Ryoga had applied and been accepted. "I could never have pictured Ryoga as being a chef" she admitted.

"I'm going to transfer a school in Paris and go with him. I can't have him attending a prestigious academy like that while getting lost all the time" she explained.

Ukyou smiled "you know I've always pictured you and your brother living together forever" she said and then added "sorry, I hope that wasn't offensive"

"Yes, us wearing our uniforms as we age and getting weirder as time goes on. Don't worry, I thought about that too. I definitely prefer it this way, I'll be in Paris with Ryoga and you'll keep my brother company" she said to the woman she almost considered to be her sister-in-law.

"He's in good hands" she assured Kodachi, who just rolled her eyes.

The Boys Section

"Why do the girls keep on looking at us?" Ryoga asked; he also wore a black suit, white shirt and yellow tie that matched the bandana he'd insisted on wearing. He looked over at his girlfriend; she'd whimsically ordered a dress that matched his bandana, as she liked them to coordinate and looked adorable in it.

Kuno glanced over; he was a vision in a dark grey suit and black turtleneck. "They're talking about us" he explained. "Girls do that when they get together"

"All good I hope" Mousse said.

Ryoga looked at Ranma "so are you still waiting for your wedding night?"

Ranma laughed, at eighteen he'd grown taller, filled out and his facial features had leaned. "Yes, but we might have to move the wedding date up at this rate" he said. "Did you wait Mousse?" he asked him.

Mousse blushed slightly then said "Yes, for about two seconds after the ceremony. We dashed back to our appointed hut and were late for our own wedding banquet. They searched for us everywhere except for the most obvious place; the bridal hut" he laughed at the memory. "How about you Ryoga?" he inquired.

Ryoga blushed and glanced at Kuno "what sort of question is that to ask in front of my girlfriend's brother?" he demanded.

Kuno took a sip of his drink "go ahead, I'm curious about the answer myself"

"Yes, we're waiting, though I might have to ask Ranma for his secret on how he got Akane to agree to marry him so soon" he said.

Ranma grinned at the memory and then glanced at Kuno, who looked back at him suspiciously. "I'll email you the instructions" he promised Ryoga.

"How about you Kuno, are you waiting for marriage?" Mousse asked.

Kuno was about to answer when a gold bangled arms snaked around him, he turned to see his girlfriend. She looked wonderful in an empire waist burgundy crepe dress that so dark that it looked almost brown. It ended at mid thigh, showing off her long legs and a jeweled broach was affixed under her bust line. "Definitely not, I took his cherry a long time ago. A girl's got needs" she said, she got on tiptoe to kiss his cheek and then flitted off to rejoin the girls.

Kuno blushed and than looked rather smug "that's my girl" he said. He'd been accepted to Tokyo University had managed to talk Ukyou into opening a new restaurant in Hongo Bunkyo-ku, as she wished to expand her business anyway and was training a replacement to take over the one in Nerima.

After much eating, drinking and celebrating, the party drew to a close and one by one the couples left.

Shampoo and Mousse

Both were a bit tipsy and walking home holding hands and giggling about things inconsequential. When Shampoo stopped in front of a house "I have to show house to prospective client" she said and pulled him towards it.

"Now, who would want to meet you this time of night? Is he a vampire?" asked Mousse.

"Come silly, you see" she said unlocking the door and led him inside. She started showing him the house "house belong to government official who transfer to America, must sell right away or lose huge bonus. It sell way below market value, it have three washrooms and four bedrooms, washrooms and kitchen recently updated. No need anything, move in condition. Backyard huge and has too too beautiful garden. It very safe area and have many young family, with excellent schools within walking distance" she said. She showed him all the features of the house and then turned to him. "You interested?" she asked.

"You mean you want to buy this house?" Mousse said in a startled voice.

"Great-grandmother give huge cheque for wedding, easily have down payment. We buy and still have enough for renovate apartment over Nekohanten to upscale dining area, no mortgage there. We can more then afford to buy house" she said persuasively.

"Why do we need this much space, there's only the two of us and, oh" he said when it dawned on him why "You're not saying that?" he said.

She laughed "no not yet, but should be prepared when we are and bargain like this not come on market everyday" she pointed out. "What Mousse say, we make offer?" she asked.

"Sold" he said. "Now show me the master bedroom again" he requested.

Kodachi and Ryoga

They got back to the mansion and Kodachi poured them each another drink "So isn't it great that Ranma and Akane are getting married so soon? It's great when people don't bother waiting when they know its right" Ryoga said.

"We're waiting" she said flatly.

"Why are you intending to accept my brother's proposal instead?" he teased her.

"No I only love one Habiki" she said. "I'm a Kuno, we can't be rushed or coerced" she said defiantly. "Where are you going?" she asked when Ryoga started to leave the room.

"To check my email; I'm expecting one from Ranma" he explained. "Do you know if Gaston has any canned whipped cream?" he asked

"Check the fridge; what do you need it for?" Kodachi asked suspiciously. Ryoga just bared his fangs at her in a solicitous grin.

Ukyou and Kuno

Ukyou pulled the jeweled clip out of her hair and let it tumble down her back. "Good party" she commented.

"Give you any ideas?" Kuno asked watching her.

"Perhaps for later, being a teenaged Mom isn't my idea of a dream come true" she replied.

"Oh, you think that I want children?" he teased.

"You'd better, I intend to have a whole bunch of them" she said.

What if I decline?" he teased.

"You won't be given a choice in the matter" she said poking him in his well toned stomach.

"I don't know, you'll gain weight and I think your body is perfect the way it is" he said running his hands down her waist in appreciation.

"I'm going to get huge, I'm going to have stretch marks and you'l love every second of it" she commanded

"I can't wait" he said sourly. "So tomorrow's Sunday, what do you want to do?" he asked.

"I thought we would spend most of the day in bed and then go out to dinner" she suggested.

"I'm up for that" he replied with a wicked grin.

"You'd better be" she said sidling up to him.

Ranma and Akane

Ranma was looking in the fridge when Kasumi asked him "Can I help you find something Ranma?"

Ranma jumped "I was looking for whipped cream, Akane and I want to make sundaes" he said with his face flaming.

"After all that food? Oh well, I bought plenty to go with the cake. Will two cans do?" she asked holding them out to him.

"T-that more then enough" Ranma stammered and took them. He returned to the living room where Akane was watching the light being reflected off of her new engagement ring.

"I love it Ray!" she gushed again. "So what were you boys talking about?" she asked nonchalantly.

"Martial arts moves. How about you girls?" he asked just as causally.

"Shopping, the conversation would've bored you to death" she replied.

"When shall we have the wedding?" Ranma asked.

"I think a year from now" Akane replied.

Ranma held up the whipped cream "Let's go to your room, I'm pretty sure I can get you down to two months from now" he suggested.

Akane's face flamed, but she eagerly raced him there.

Kasumi giggled at the sound of teenaged feet hurrying in the direction of Akane's room and went online.

Voodoospike: Hi, I'm new here. Would anyone like to chat?

Cutiekitty: Welcome Voodoospike, I'm the mod on here. I only ask that you keep your language clean and don't be mean. What are you in the mood to chat about today?

Voodoospike: The girl of my dreams just got engaged to my somewhat enemy and I just wanted to vent my frustrations about that.

Cutiekitty: I know just the thread to send you to, it's very popular today. It's like an entire high school is mourning the loss of the same girl! It's called 'Red is Gone and now I'm Blue'

FIN

A/N for those that don't know, Akane means Red


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